Recovery Elevator | Stop Drinking, Start Recovering. | Alcohol, Addiction & Life In Sobriety

Today we have Liz, she's 38 from LaVale, MD and took her last drink on December 31st, 2022. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.      [02:22] Highlights from Paul:   This is not a religious podcast. Paul feels that religion and spirituality are not two sides of the same coin.   When we drink alcohol, spiritually, our electrical current to the universe is severed. In fact, in many cultures, the name alcohol literally means, soul sucking spirit. Then mentally, the chemical alcohol turns our brains into tepid soup. After that, we have the physical component - pancreatitis and liver failure come to mind.   What is spirituality? What is a spiritual practice? We are connecting with the self. We are connecting within. You become more ocean and less wave. In short, spirituality is connection with the self, which then leads to a connection with nature, the universe, a higher power, and some may call it God. Why do we drink? Why did we dri

Today we've got a panel of sober rockstars who have been kicking ass and taking names in this field for a while now. You're going to love it.     [02:33] Highlights from Paul:   We are full of expectations. Both for ourselves and other people. Top of that list is we expect happiness in a world where nothing is guaranteed. We have been conditioned throughout our life that any discomfort represents failure, and a certain product, drink or pill will end the suffering.   How do we let expectations go? It's impossible. All you can do is become aware you are expecting something different for yourself or other people.   Another reason why expectations are dangerous is it throws gratitude right out of the window. We also expect the earth to keep providing the natural resources needed for our survival, which are never guaranteed. We definitely need to approach sunshine, fresh drinking water, clean air, and shelter from a stance of gratitude opposed to expecting them to be delivered to us because we deserve the

Today we have Mark who is 45 from Connecticut and took his last drank on January 15, 2023. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Thank you to all of the Café RE chat hosts. You all do a great job!    [01:55] Highlights from Paul:   It is impossible to avoid conflict in a human life. All attempts to avoid it,  will only result in more conflict. It built into the human experience. After all, we are reconciling the Yin to our Yang on a daily basis. Somedays the dark side says take a seat, and the next day, we welcome the light.   Addictions take hold when is there is intense inner conflict. When parts of our personalities are out of balance. Or when parts of us are screaming for attention because we are in pain. In addition, this inner imbalance is a representation that the whole of society is out of balance causing many of us to question "what the hell is going on?". Your individual unrest is not separate from the whole.   And how

Today we have Lacey. She's 34 from Illinois and has been sober since May 15, 2020. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  [02:16] Highlights from Kris:   We feel it is important to use these first few episodes of Season Five to set a foundation for the upcoming year. Kris shares the RE mission statement and talks about what each of the six key themes means to him.   To recap, our mission statement: we offer hope through community and connection. Partnering sobriety seeking individuals with other likeminded people.   Over and over and over again, you're going to hear us, and our guests, talk about the importance of connection. It's not because it's the only thing we know how to talk about; but simply because it's THAT IMPORTANT.   Recovery Elevator's Six Themes:   1)    We are inclusive 2)    There is no right or wrong way to do this 3)    Connection 4)    Don't just quit drinking 5)    We need to remain open 6)    We must

Today we have Alex, he is 35, from Lincoln, NE and took his last drink on January 20, 2023 Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    [03:35] Highlights from Paul:   Welcome to Season 5!  Episode 1 of this podcast dropped on February 25th, 2015. Paul recalls the date and how he felt.  He was worried he was going to crash and burn.  But 10,000,000 downloads later, he still hasn't had a drink and the podcast is still going.   Paul discusses the plan for Season 5, what RE's concepts and values are, the podcast schedule and more.   Mission Statement of Recovery Elevator is as follows:   "We offer hope through community and connection. Partnering sobriety seeking individuals with other likeminded people!"   Six themes Paul and Kris will be focusing on this season:   1)    Recovery Elevator is inclusive 2)    There is no right or wrong way to do this 3)    Connection 4)    Don't just quit drinking 5)    We cannot fight an addict

Today we have Gary, he is 44, from Toledo, OH and took his last drink on January 30, 2023 Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    [01:42] Thoughts from Paul:   Today we are going to cover one of Paul's favorite tools and practice.  But before we cover it, he asks us who is our go to person that we look to when life starts to veer into the ditch? Who has already provided guidance or a teaching on what to do in the situation you find yourself in?   For Paul, it is Eckhart Tolle. His books The Power of Now and A New Earth were recommended to him at just the right time.   The tool and concept Paul wants to cover is a line he discovered in A New Earth that says, "don't lose yourself in it". This refers to the thinking mind, or the ego.    Another book The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer shares the concept that you are not the thoughts in your mind, but you are the one who experiences them.   The point is don't lose yourself in th

Today we have Daniel, he is 43 from Orange County, he took his last drink on December 31st, 2014. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  [01:42] Thoughts from Paul:   The discomforts of quitting drinking will make you a stronger person down the road. And not far down the road.    Although humans are hardwired to seek comfort, it's not necessarily good for us. Many anthropologists have speculated that we were happier thousands of years ago. Our needs were simpler and easier to satisfy. We were naturally mindful, living in the moment. In addition, our ancestors usually found themselves in tight communities of around 150 people, where everyone shared the burden of survival. There was a deeper sense of belonging.   The rates of mental health, addiction, inflammations, cancers, are sky rocketing, and the author of the book says the reason for this is because we are living progressively sheltered, sterile, temperature controlled, over-fe

Today we have Julie, she is 49, from Grand Junction, CO and took her last drink on February 6th, 2022. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.      [02:05] Thoughts from Paul:   For most of the 20th century and well into the 2000's, there was a pushed narrative that said a daily drink or two is good for you.  Although there was a time that fermented drinks were safer than consuming the local water due to disease, it's safe to say we are well past those days from the dark ages.  Despite that, the concept that alcohol is good for you is still in popular circulation, but a new narrative is coming out.   An article from Health Day released this year is titled Drinking Alcohol Brings No Health Benefits, Study Finds   Huberman Lab podcast:  What Alcohol Does to Your Body, Brain & Health   You're giving up alcohol, which turns out is NOT good for you anyways, for a life that contains the possibilities of nearly everything. Sobriet

Today we have Katy, she is 40, from Olympia, WA and took her last drink on February 12th, 2023. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.     [02:26] Thoughts from Paul:   One of the best parts of doing the Recovery Elevator podcast is seeing the transformations people make.  Many of the travelers on this year's Costa Rica trip also traveled last year. With every single repeat traveler, Paul could see the growth almost immediately. There are many different reasons for the transformations, but it is always visible in the smile.   Paul wants to make a correction from a previous episode where he said that Goat Yoga was a horrible idea. Incorporating animals in our healing can be a great thing. One reason for this is the nervous systems of animals are much more intact, and with entrainment theory in biology, our nervous systems can heal while being around animals. Also, goats are hilarious. They are all about having fun and if you come near

Today we have Joss, she's 34 from the Bay Area and took her last drink on December 21st, 2022.   Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    [02:21] Thoughts from Kris:   Spring has finally arrived in North Dakota!   With the changing seasons, it's not uncommon to experience some different emotions surrounding our recovery. More outdoor social activities and parties can bring some unique challenges.   We sometimes worry what others might think about us and our choice not to drink. The phrasing "I care what people think of me" makes me feel a bit middle-schoolish, but humans long for connection and community. We are not really fearing the event so much as fearing that we don't belong. Creating accountability with people we trust can help us navigate these times, and sometimes just passing on the event may be what we need to do for the time being.   Stay tuned for more tips gathered from our members at Café RE after the interview!

Today we have Dale, he is 55, from Roanoke, VA and he has been alcohol free since March 23, 2019   [02:34] Paul's thoughts:   Paul knows now that there is a connection between his drinking and his anxiety but while actively drinking, he could not. We are told that alcohol relaxes us – which it does by shutting down important parts of our brain.   According to Dr. Sheila Shilati,"Alcohol ultimately replaces those important chemicals like dopamine and serotonin in the brain, which mitigate anxiety, therefore, in episodes where you are not drinking, then your brain is searching for those all-important 'feel-good' connections, which become diminished because the supply has been mitigated,"   We hear a lot about "self-medicating" in recovery. Which isn't a bad thing, but when we rely too much on this strategy, it stops working. This becomes an even bigger problem because we don't realize it so we just drink more and now our coping strategy is becoming the reason we can't cope.   Paul shares in episode 417

Today we have Lauren, she is 54 from Rochester NY, and took her last drink on November 19, 2022.   Shout out to Ty with 15 YEARS alcohol free!  Thank you for all you do for RE!   Shout out to Bradley from south Denver with 3 days alcohol free!  Great job! Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    [03:23] Intro summary:   In the past Paul has talked about the worst  place a person can be with a drinking problem is in limbo (episode 417). But how do we find out if we actually have a problem so we can get out of that space?   There is a test listed in the DSM-5 to determine if we have a drinking problem or not. There are 11 questions, and you must meet two of them within the past 12 months to have what is called Alcohol Use Disorder. It's not hard to determine if you have a drinking problem based on that test.   But at the end of the day, it can be as simple as if you question if you have a drinking problem, you just answered your own

Today we have Ian, he is 24, from Baltimore, MD and he has been alcohol free since December 26, 2022. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  [02:15] Thoughts from Paul:   If alcohol isn't the primary problem, and it's a symptom of something else, what does that mean, and what course of action do we take? None of us are able to correct the unrest in our lives when alcohol is present. That's why moderate drinking for the problematic drinker doesn't work either.   For Paul, after he ditched the booze, he recognized that his nervous system needed healing and found that nature was a great help with addressing that. Everyone is different and their sources of unrest that need addressing will be different but first, the alcohol needs to go and then the healing can begin. We get one life, and your addiction is about to springboard you towards your authentic self – if you are willing. You may be asking yourself "am I willing?"…If you are liste

Today we have Jeffrey, he is 35, from Monument, CO and he took his last drink on July 23, 2022.   Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    [02:16] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul shares that he recently attended an AA meeting where a member celebrated 40 years of sobriety. One thing he took away from this is that it will naturally get easier the more time away from alcohol you have and the more life experience you get. It is also helpful to focus not on the destination, but the journey itself.   There is a YouTube channel that Paul watches where the host, Michael, showcases some of the most scenic railways in the world. Michael also shares similar views about the destination vs. the journey. Here is the link to one of his videos documenting the scenic Amtrak train route from Denver to Winter Park Ski Resort.   When we realize that hard days are a part of life, and that hard days are a part of an alcohol-free life, things get easier. Wi

Today we have Doug. He is 59, from Buena Vista, CO and he took his last drink on July 28, 1982. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    [2:30] Thoughts from Paul:   When building your recovery portfolio, a good goal is 50% external and 50% internal. At first, the internal work may be too big of an ask, but as your nervous system settles down, you want to aim for a balanced split. Here are some quick examples of what I mean when I say external vs internal:   External: Driving to an AA meeting, or hopping on a Café RE zoom chat Phoning a sober friend Working with a sponsor   Internal: Meditation Journaling Reading Quit-Lit   When building out your recovery I recommend this 5-tiered approach: 1. Community – AA, SMART, Café RE, therapy, sober friends. Burn the Ships! 2. Action/Movement – Chemicals of wellbeing, endorphins, dopamine, and serotonin are released when we move.   3. Inner Peace – Meditation, breathwork, creative

Today we have Abby. She is 49, from Phoenix, AZ, and took her last drink on 9/25/2020.   Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.   [03:23] Thoughts from Kris:   In an effort to escape the long North Dakota winter, Kris and his wife took a short vacation to Dallas. They had a fantastic time enjoying the city and the company of friends. The key takeaways Kris had are the importance of self-care and connection. He believes that most people are very resilient, and we tend to allow things to keep stacking things onto our plate to the point of overwhelm. That's when we need to take time to slow down and take care of ourselves; how that looks is different for everyone.   [9:30] Kris introduces Abby:   Abby took her last drink on September 25, 2020.  She's 49 and lives in Arizona. She's single and has a young adult daughter who lives nearby. She is self employed doing online marketing for small businesses. She likes to cook, read and stay a

Today we have Laura. She is 45, from Boston, MA, and took her last drink on September 27, 2014. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.      [02:07] Highlights from Paul:   Paul feels that addictions are adaptations to unhealthy environments. Rates of addiction, disease, inflammations, and cancers are all on the rise. In recovery we are tasked with creating a world for ourselves and others where we feel connected, worthy, and part of the community. Recovery is not about new world exploration but restoring the circuitry we were born with. Addiction could be what forces us to come together, put our differences aside and start loving each other.   Paul thinks that it is our job in recovery to create a life for ourselves and others that doesn't require alcohol for wholeness. He's up for the task, how about you?     [6:36] Paul introduces Laura:   Laura is 45 years old, lives in Boston, has one daughter and is recently engaged. She is a

Today we have Susannah. She is 42 from Hampshire, England, and took her last drink on 4/29/2022. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  [03:09] Highlights from Paul:   Paul shares a blog post created by Odette regarding happiness in sobriety. He also shares his thoughts that sobriety does not equal happiness or solve all of our problems, but it does give us the chance to build a life where happiness knocks on the door more frequently. The school of sobriety is going to teach you the most important lessons of life. Love and acceptance. It will keep teaching you these lessons until you have accepted, that's the lesson to learn.     [10:40] Kris introduces Susannah:   Susannah is about to celebrate 10 months of sobriety. She lives in the south of England; she is married, and they have three boys and two dogs. She works in luxury concierge. In her free time, she enjoys walking and is looking forward to expanding her garden this year.

Today we have Stephanie. She is 44 from Georgetown, MA and took her last drink on September 6, 2020. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Recovery Elevator podcast just surpassed 10 million downloads!  Thank you to our guests, all the team members, Café RE members, and especially our listeners!   [2:49] Highlights from Paul:   In an age where almost everything plugs in, we as human beings do not. Often when we are feeling upset or triggered, one (or more than one) aspect of H.A.L.T is at play. Try and ask yourself if you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely and Tired.   Paul gives us a lot of suggestions of simple ways to address these feelings and asks the listener – how do you keep it simple?  Let us know on Monday's post on Instagram in the comment area!   [10:42] Paul introduces Stephanie:   Stephanie took her last drink on September 6th, 2020. She is 44 years old, lives in Georgetown, Massachusetts. She is married and has two boys, ages

Today we have Matthew. He is 49 from Phoenix, AZ, and has been a sober rock star since 12/15/2006. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    [03:00] Highlights from Paul:   As humans, we are prone to the trap that things will be better, or we will feel better after x, y or z happens. If we are constantly attaching happiness to accomplishments, checklists, or sobriety clocks, then eventually this surface level happiness fades and doesn't last nearly as long. Diffusing this trap is our most important task as a species at the moment. To find inner peace regardless of what is going on outside.   The first thing we can do to confront the trap is recognize it and then try to find happiness in the present moment while working towards the goal in mind. This is being okay with being okay or being okay even if you feel like dog crap. You are not doing sobriety, or anything wrong, if you have a bad day or 50.   To be fair, we do feel better whe