Recovery Elevator | Stop Drinking, Start Recovering. | Alcohol, Addiction & Life In Sobriety

Today we have Nick, with 111 days sober.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    On today's episode Paul discusses anxiety, depression and stress.   "These pains you feel are messengers. Listen to them." ~ Rumi.       Depression is when mental energies are stuck in the past, anxiety is when we are living in the future, and stress accumulates when the end goal is more important than the task at hand.   Liberation from all three of these dysfunctions resides in the present moment.    There is an undeniable connection between alcohol and depression.  Remove alcohol and the bulk of melancholy should be lifted within a matter of months.  Anxiety levels should also return to baseline after removing alcohol from your life.  When we are primarily focused on the end outcome, and not the task at hand, we experience stress.  Stress can be devastating to the equanimity in the body.  The most powerful remedy to depression, anxiety, and stress is to

Today we have Sami with a sobriety date of July 21, 2018. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  On today's podcast Paul discuses surrender.  What does is really mean to reach a point of surrendering?  It doesn't have to be complicated.  Surrendering simply means yielding to your next stage in life.  As Paul mentioned on a previous podcast, addictions are no more than sign posts in life, and surrender is when we fully accept them and make, what is most likely to be the most important change in our life, quitting alcohol.    Once we reach that moment when we realize that there are no more ways to moderate, when we clearly see that any attempt at moderation results in a dumpster fire, we usually find ourselves saying things like; f*ck it, I quit, I'm done, or I can't do this anymore.  If you've ever muttered those words then congratulations!  You've hit what Paul calls the 'now what' milestone, which is huge.  This is when we enter into a m

Today we have James, with a sobriety date of November 12, 2016.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    Recovery Elevator is on Instagram!  Please follow Paul and Ben here .   On today's podcast Paul discuses relapse.  For some, and Paul has only met a few, relapse isn't part of their story.  But for the vast majority it is, and it isn't something to be ashamed of.  Spontaneous sobriety is rare.  Paul feels that the word 'relapse' is another word in recovery, similar to the word 'alcoholic', that needs to be thrown out.  The word 'relapse' has implications of failure.    When we drink again, after having made the internal declaration not to, we are simply doing more field research, learning lessons along the way.  If you find yourself in a continuous cycle of field research, self-compassion is key.   Stop placing success and failure parameters on whether you drank last night or not.  When we start addressing what we are using alcohol to

Today we have Brad with a sobriety date of August 31, 2018.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Paul talks about the 'now' and ways we can ground ourselves while we find ourselves taking this thing one day at a time.  At some period in our journey we will find ourselves logging our days in our tracker like it 'ain't no thing'.  Then there are other days when we wake up and keeping the mind in check can be a constant struggle.   Paul shares some of his own favorite personal techniques that he uses to ground himself.  Acknowledge what is really happening. Think in terms of "we" rather than "I" Take your shoes off and walk barefooted outside. You are nature…take time to go out in your natural setting, nature. Slow down. Do not multitask Pay close attention to the body Go from saying, "I can get through this', to saying, "I AM getting through this". Go with the gut. Last one is I tell myself "Dude, Paul…this isn't you!"   SHOW NOTES   [

Today we have Libby, with 112 days of sobriety.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Paul talks about a trend he noticed in the airport bookstore.  Amongst the '20 best sellers' there were several books with clear, unambiguous titles.  Our society is collectively starting to wake up and are looking for ways to unf*ck ourselves.  He says that all of these books, including the one he is currently writing, are not fulfilling a trend or a niche, but that it's a movement.  https://newrepublic.com/article/153153/age-anxiety Paul recently read an article titled the Age of Anxiety in the New Republic, According to studies by the National Institute of Mental Health, nearly 20 percent of Americans experience an anxiety disorder in a given year; over 30 percent experience an anxiety disorder over the course of their lifetimes. And the rate is rising: The American Psychiatric Association, in a May study drawing from a survey of 1,000 American adul

Today we have Ashley, with 192 days of sobriety.  Paul talks about how alcohol is the invitation.  What is this invitation?  It's called addiction.  Depending on how you RSVP you could have a life filled with infinite joy.  The fact that you are listening to this podcast right now is a good clue as to how you're going to RSVP.  At first the invitations may not show up with enough frequency to connect the dots.  But, sooner or later, these invitations will start to show up more frequently, once a year, once every 6 months, once a week, once a day in every aspect of our lives.  For many that struggle with addiction they ignore this invitation their entire lives and it is not pretty.  If we stick to this long enough it will become clear that our addiction is the best thing that has happened for us.  For those of you listening, you have earned your invitation.  Keep in mind the pain and suffering required to initiate this positive change in behind you.  This thing called life, if it hasn't already, is about to ge

Today we have Dr. Sue Morter. She talks to us about how our bodies and minds have the capacity to heal themselves if we allow it. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Paul discusses addiction and how there are hundreds of definitions for what addiction is.   He has covered several of them on this podcast already, and covers many more in the book that he is currently writing. Some definitions are scientific. Some are psychological. Some explain the disease theory. He brings up another definition that, in his opinion, may be the simplest and most accurate. Paul suggests that addiction(s) are nothing more than signposts in life. Addictions are nudges from the body, your internal and external environments, that signify that a change needs to occur. Many people struggling with addiction ignore these internal and external cues their entire lives, and this gets ugly. There are signposts everywhere in life.  Paul's advice? Get out of the way an

Today we have Mina with a sobriety date of May 30, 2017.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Paul discusses the most controversial word he has encountered in AA.  The word is recovered, as in your addiction to alcohol is behind you.  Although recovered is mentioned in the books of AA, after Paul said the word in an AA meeting, he noticed a shift in the energy in the room.  Ty (who has been editing the podcasts for over 150 episodes straight…Thank you Ty!), found the word recovered mentioned over 20 times in The Big Book and the Twelve and Twelve.  So why is the word recovered so controversial?  Is recovered even such a thing?      SHOW NOTES   [10:30] Paul Introduces Mina.   Mina with a sobriety date of May 30, 2017, is 37 years old and is from Stockholm, Sweden.  He is single and has no children.  He is a software engineer.  For fun Mina likes to read, visit museums and exhibitions, and spend time in libraries.         [12:20] Give u

Today we have Tricia, with a sobriety date of November 14, 2016.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Sometimes we reach a moment in our journey where we say, "what's next?".  Paul discusses what he would recommend when you reach this moment.   Do not go 'seeking', that reinforces a mind state that we are lacking something.   Instead, listen to the body.  The body is going to tell you where to go next.    SHOW NOTES   [7:30] Paul Introduces Tricia.   Tricia with a sobriety date of November 14, 2016, is 37 years old and lives in Dallas, TX.  Tricia is a chef by trade, a business owner, and has a few side hustles.  She is divorced and does not have kids, but has a 'manfriend'.  For fun Tricia likes to do crafts and puzzles, and enjoys live music.    [8:40] Give us a little background about your drinking.    Tricia grew up around alcoholism and addiction.  She had her first drink at 16 years old, getting drunk at a party to get back at a

Today we have Steven with a sobriety date of August 7, 2016. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Paul talks about courage.  Courage is being OK with not knowing what is happening next.  We don't know what's going to happen when we quit drinking.  This can be frightening.  In recovery we don't need to be at level 10 courageousness at all times.  Paul's advice is to listen to your body, it will tell you when it's time to be courageous or time to go a little slower.      SHOW NOTES   [7:36] Paul Introduces Steven.   Steven, with a sobriety date of August 7, 2016, is 30 years old and is from Bakersfield, CA.  He works for a utility company.  He has a beautiful girlfriend.  Steven has always enjoyed outdoor activities and since being sober he has added reading and meditation to his list of things he enjoys.    [10:00] Give us a little background about your drinking.    Steven had his first few beers at the age of 13, but didn't start drinki

Today we have Juan, with a sobriety date of May 29, 2018.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    After the interview with Juan, Paul will discuss detoxing from alcohol and how dangerous it can be.  Paul talks about cravings.  What they are, what they represent, and what to do when we experience them.  Also, are all cravings the same?  In simple form, a craving is a desire to regulate our inner state with an external substance or behavior.      SHOW NOTES   [9:25] Paul Introduces Bill.   Juan, with a sobriety date of May 29, 2018, is 32 years old and is from Los Angeles, CA.   He is a personal assistant, and single.  For fun Juan likes to play music (he is in a band), go to the movies, hike, workout.      [10:25] Give us a little background about your drinking.    Juan started drinking at the age of 19 to 'fit in'.  He had recently come out as a gay man and drinking helped him feel more confident and comfortable in his own skin.  Tourin

Today we have Bill with a sobriety date of October 8, 2018.    Paul shares the news he is writing a book, which he hopes to launch by July 1.  As that date gets closer, he will be asking for volunteers to be part of the launch team so be on the lookout for that opportunity if that is something you would like to be a part of. After doing something long enough some trends start to appear.  In Ep. 52, after 1 year of podcasting, Paul did a summery of what he learned during the 1st year.  In this episode he will cover the 4 themes that people successful in sobriety have fully embraced.  Community Accountability Thinking Trust       SHOW NOTES   [10:15] Paul Introduces Bill.   Bill, with a sobriety date of October 8, 2018, is 49 years old and is from northern New Jersey.   He does investment research for an insurance company.  Bill has been married for a little over 20 years and has two kids.  Bill finds fun in outdoor activities such as camping and fishing.      [12:56] Give us a little background about your dr

Today we have Crystal with 84 days of sobriety.  This is a special podcast episode!  It marks 4 consecutive years of podcasting…208 straight Mondays in a row.  Paul talks about how Recovery Elevator and the RE community has saved his life, and shares ways we can all help others stop drinking.   SHOW NOTES [11:00] Paul Introduces Crystal. Crystal has been sober for 84 days and lives in San Antonio, Texas.  She is a life style/transformation coach.  She is 30 years old and recently single.  For fun Crystal likes to workout.       [12:56] Give us a little background about your drinking.    Crystal considered herself a binge drinker.  She tried to moderate her drinking by only drinking on the weekends, as her drinking was starting to affect her work and relationships, but that led to going hard core on the weekends.    [15:00] When did you first realize you had a problem with alcohol?   That was a couple of years ago when she realized she didn't drink like other people.  She always wanted more to drink, always wa

Today we have Tom, with a sobriety date of June 6, 2018.    We've all heard of FOMO, or the Fear Of Missing Out.  Today I want to talk to you about JOMO – the Joy Of Missing Out.  The Joy Of Missing Out is the emotionally intelligent antidote to FOMO, and is essentially about being present and content where you are at this moment in life.  Instead of constantly trying to keep up with the Jones', JOMO allows us to be who we are in the present moment, which is the secret to finding happiness. At the end of the episode I have a bunch of "You might be an alcoholic if…" lines.  Listeners I would love to hear your own "You might be an alcoholic if" lines.  Email them to [email protected] and put YMBAAI in the subject line.  SHOW NOTES [6:55] Paul Introduces Tom. Tom, who considered himself a high-functioning alcoholic, is 50 years old, lives in Seattle, Washington, and has a sobriety date of 6/4/18.  He is married, has two children, and a pug named Violet.  He works in the high tech field.  [10:30] Give us

Today we have Dusty, with a sobriety date of  9/21/15. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  I recently finished reading the book The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell.  The book isn't specifically a recovery book, but some of the ideas and themes can be applied to getting sober and staying sober.  When it comes to the journey into sobriety there are 2 tipping points I want to cover in this episode.  The first one happens when you start to question whether alcohol is serving a positive purpose in your life and the second one occurs when you quit drinking.  At the end of the episode I will talk about a third tipping point, one to avoid.    SHOW NOTES   [6:55] Paul Introduces Dusty.   Dusty is 38 years old, lives in Bozeman, Montana, and has a sobriety date of 9/21/15, just over 39 months since his last drink.  He is an accountant.  He loves playing recreational sports, just started playing hockey this year, after learning how to skate. 

Today we have Kane, with 49 days of sobriety. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Recover Who We Were Meant To Be Tony Robbins and Russell Brand recently did a podcast titled Recover Your True Self.  In this episode there are two value bombs I want to talk about.  The first is Russell Brand's definition of recovery, and the other is his idea of the main intention of the 12 steps. At the end of the episode, I share a story about letting go.     SHOW NOTES [6:49 ]  Paul introduces Kane Kane is 45, lives in Adelaide, Australia, and has 49 days of sobriety.  He is a government worker.  He loves hiking and doing yoga in the mornings.  He is also a birdwatcher.  He likes socializing, and has been doing more social events since he's been sober.  [ 11:00 ]  Give us a little background about your drinking.  He started drinking in late high school, and quickly progressed to "drinking for drunkenness."  In college, alcohol became an escape from

Today we have Lucy, with 65 days of sobriety. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Do I need to avoid social situations where alcohol will be present?    The answer is yes, then no, then yes.  Sorry if that's confusing. I explain better in the episode.   [8:40] Paul introduces Lucy   Lucy, with 65 days of sobriety, lives in London England.  She is a freelance makeup artist, which she loves doing.  She is single, likes walking, hiking, cooking, and drawing.   [11:30] Give us a little background about your drinking.   Lucy had her first experience with alcohol at age 12.  Her drinking kicked into full swing after she was 18, when she began working in bar and nightclubs.  She feels that it was a very quick descent into binge drinking and blackouts.  By the time she was 21 she found herself drinking alone more and more.  She lost every bar job she had because she would not show up for work because she was hungover.   [17:34]  Lucy's first v

Today we have Jeff, with over 2 years since his last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  That could never happen… Analysis of the famed James Bond movies reveals that James Bond is a full-blown functioning alcoholic living on borrowed time.  "There is strong and consistent evidence that James Bond has a chronic alcohol consumption problem at the severe end of the spectrum… His workplace, MI6, needs to become a more responsible employer and refer him to support services and change their corporate drinking culture."  The amount of alcohol that James Bond is consuming in the films is enough to leave someone far too disabled to engage in any kind of crime fighting.  SHOW NOTES   [7:07] Paul Introduces Jeff. Jeff has been sober just over two years.  He's 43 years old and lives near Denver, Colorado.  He is married with one adult son.  He and his wife enjoy Netflix, boating, and writing.  He is the same guest as a previous guest

Today we have Warren, with 48 hours since his last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  12 reasons why sober is better: 1 - Look your best.   2 - Look and feel properly rested. 3 - Alcohol fixes things you didn't notice were broken.  4 - Make the most of your time.  5 - Build better relationships.  The opposite of addiction is connection. 6 - More confidence.  You can do anything you put your mind to.  7 - Less fear! 8 - Save your money.  9 - Be more present.  10 - Avoid unnecessary disasters.  11 - Create the future you want.  12 - Improved memory SHOW NOTES   [8:20] Paul Introduces Warren.   Warren is 40 years old, from Martinsville, Virginia, and has been sober for 48 hours.  He's married with two children.  He is the executive director of a domestic violence outreach program.  He also owns a sound company.  He enjoys fishing and camping, and the outdoors.  He thinks you shouldn't always believe what you think.  He's strug

Today we have Jeff, with 38 days since his last drink. During this festive holiday season, we will, no doubt, we encouraged to drink at one point or another.  We can't think ourselves out of long-term addiction, but in the moment, there are tools we can use to help gives us the ability to say no.  Follow the drink, and play the tape forward.  There is plenty of data behind us to help us make an informed decision.  If I have this drink, what will happen?  Remember why you quit in the first place and remember all of the positive benefits you have experienced from sobriety.  We all know alcoholic beverages can pack in the calories, but does alcohol have any nutritional value?  It's safe to say that a Twinkie has more nutritional value than any alcoholic beverage.  By not drinking, you are not denying yourself of any vital nutrients.  In fact, alcohol inhibits general digestion in a big way.    SHOW NOTES   [8:57] Paul Introduces Jeff. Jeff has been sober for 38 days.  Jeff is 27 years old, from Quebec City, C