Recovery Elevator | Stop Drinking, Start Recovering. | Alcohol, Addiction & Life In Sobriety

Today we have Walter, with 2½ years since his last drink.   Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  The Cure to Addiction… Is it possible?  Are we close to a cure?  No.  AA was founded in 1935, and since then we still don't know what causes it or how to treat it.  A holistic cure will attack/treat the root causes.   The Rat Park experiment by Bruce Alexander points to the conclusion that the causes of addiction are social and environmental, rather than genetics or chemical dependency.  In the study, the addictive tendencies were eliminated when the stress was reduced and the environment changed.  Johann Hari's Ted Talk says that the opposite of addiction isn't sobriety, it's connection.  Addiction is not about the pleasurable effects of substances, rather it is a symptom of the user's inability to form deep connections with other human beings.  The phenomena that is addiction will likely die out in a global community whose only borde

Today we have Asaph, with 6 weeks and 4 days since his last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Gratitude, what is it good for?... everything.  Gratitude is a topic that needs to be continually covered in recovery.  It's a box in recovery that will never be checked, because it is ongoing.  How do we create a mindset of appreciation?  Apply some conscious attention to the things in your life that are there for you, whether it be people, or your left elbow.  Don't take things or people for granted.  Remove or avoid the sources of negativity in your life.  Gratitude is good for our brains.  It positively stimulates the hypothalamus.  We can't function without grace.  We are wired to be a grateful species.  It's easy to be thankful for the good things in our lives, but what about the not so good times?  Gratitude can help us get through life's challenges.  In fact, we can even become thankful for them.  Challenges and obstacle

Today we have Patrick, with 10 years 2 months since his last drink. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  SHOW NOTES [10:50] Paul introduces Patrick Patrick is 37 years old, and is from Brooklyn, New York.  He's been sober since August 23, 2008.  He is married and has no children.  He works as a stand up comedian, recovery coach, and a video editor.  He likes to try to squeeze in a good meal between shows, visit friends, and snowboard.  He would like to get better at rollerblading. [14:08] Give us a little background about your drinking habits He did not drink until his freshman year in college, because he has a family history of alcohol abuse.  When he tried alcohol for the first time, he loved the way it made him feel.  Alcohol became problematic within his first year of drinking.  When he was drunk, he became unpredictable: he was the guy who took off his clothes and climbed buildings.  Despite getting warnings from counselors, he con

Today we have Aaron, with over 1 year since his last drink, shares his story... Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  SHOW NOTES   [12:30] Paul Introduces Aaron. Aaron is 39 years old, from Milwaukee, Wisconsin.  He's been sober since October 16, 2017.  He's married with two children.  He works in HR and Recruitment for a small company.  He likes home improvement, the outdoors, gardening.  He likes to restore and repair his house and cars.    [15:30] Give us a little background about your drinking habits.  He has drank every day more or less since college.  There was a strong drinking culture at his college.  He made a lot of friends through drinking.  It extended to his work after college.  He associated alcohol with being social.  Alcohol made its way into all of his activities.  He didn't know how to regulate it.  He struggled to care for his children while he was drinking a lot.  He couldn't concentrate and was getting cold sweats.

Today we have Dan, who doesn't practice abstinence based recovery, but is very much on the AF Journey.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Link to the Fox News article mentioned in the episode "To be human is also to suffer from addiction. The particular vices vary as do our degree of addiction to them, but it takes precious little searching to know we've all got something unhealthy that pulls at us." - Mike Kerrigan, Fox News SHOW NOTES   [11:08] Paul Introduces Dan. Paul doesn't practice abstinence based recovery, and had a drink a few weeks ago.  He's  28 years old and lives in New York City.  He runs a channel called Recovery X and Spooky Digital.  He does MMA.  He has a family.  He practices mindfulness.    [12:48] Give us a little background about your drinking.  He started drinking when he was 10.  His brother was getting married, and his parents allowed him to have a couple drinks.  He got really drunk.  He got a lot of att

Today we have Corey with 5 days since his last drink.    Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  The mentioned article from the Irish Times   SHOW NOTES   [8:48] Paul Introduces Corey. Corey has been sober for 5 days.  He's from Minnesota, now lives in Boston.  He's 25 years old and is working full time.  He likes to exercise.  He loves music, plays guitar and piano.  He has an upcoming trip to Columbia, is learning Spanish.  He feels confused with life now that he has left the structure of school.   [13:31] Give us a little background about your drinking.  He started to drink a lot more during years in college.  He started to experiment with weed in high school.  He began to drink or party when he should have been studying.  He didn't realize there was something wrong at the time.  He used his computer to avoid academic responsibilities.  He was okay with it as long as he continued to deliver on his academic duties.  He felt like he

Today we have Kellie with 2 months since her last drink.    Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.    SHOW NOTES   [11:00] Paul Introduces Kellie. Kellie has been sober for 28 days.  She's 43 years old, married with two children.  She's a real estate broker that enjoys puzzles, reading, cooking, running and hiking, and her animals.    She tried alcohol for the first time around 10 years old.  She dabbled in different drugs in her teens.  She drank through her 20's.  She had her son at 26.  She cleaned up her act and became a stay at home mother.  In her late 30's she had weight loss surgery.  She was in the hospital and something happened to her brother.  She bought a bottle of wine.  Her drinking gradually escalated after that.      [16:48] Would you say you had an issue with food prior to the surgery? Absolutely. She ate mostly healthy food but she would eat large quantities.  Her drinking began to affect her son.  She tried to moderat

Today we have Nel with over 1 year since her last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Drinking is more than the average habit.  To reduce our problems with alcohol to a "bad habit" is missing the bigger picture.  We drink for a variety of reasons.. for example: to cope, to ignore, to numb, to hide.  Digging ourselves out of alcohol dependency actually requires the changing or removal of several habits.  We need to change the way we relax.  We need to change the way we deal with difficult emotions.  We need to become more conscious, aware, and in the moment.  We have to slowly remember the version of us that didn't need anything to be okay.  We have to change everything.  When one finds themselves in the grips of alcohol, it probably takes more time, effort, and patience to return to our emotional center than it did to lose it.  It doesn't happen overnight, and there are many lessons to be learned along the way, but with patie

Today we have Stephan with 10 months since his last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Harm Reduction - The feeling of constantly downgrading addictions.  Most of us address one addiction at a time, and usually tackle what we perceive to be the most harmful addiction first.  Things improve with each hurdle.  The lessons we learn from each stage strengthen our ability to move on to the next stage.  Often at the root of many of our addictive behaviors is essentially an addiction to thinking.  The majority of our thinking is unnecessary and just causes mental noise.  The thinking brain can take us to the worst case scenario in a matter of moments which can cause the body to respond with fight or flight.  If adrenaline becomes the main fuel that we use to get through our days, over time we will find ourselves with sickness and disease.  The key is to find a way to shut off the monkey mind without resorting to extreme activities

Today we have Kelly with 8 days since her last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  "Addiction gets harder and harder and ends in death. Sobriety is hard work too. But it gets easier and easier and ends in life." - Andy Ziegler In this passage to sobriety, expectations do not always line up with reality.  In reality, it takes years for an addiction to take hold.  The healing process takes equally as long.  The negative thinking and behavioral patterns didn't set in overnight, and won't be lifted overnight.  It's like turning a battleship.  We let go and reprogram gradually, a little bit each day, and that happens by making daily decisions that lead us down the road of self-love and health.    SHOW NOTES   [07:03] Paul Introduces Kelly.   In Fort Myers, Florida, 32 years old, sober for 8 days.  Happily divorced.  She is a mother, has a 4-year-old daughter.  She is learning who she is as a sober woman and mother.    [9:06] What

Today we have Jamie with 93 days since her last drink. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  "No amount of alcohol is safe for your overall health." "Alcohol was the leading risk factor for disease and premature death in men and women between the ages of 15 and 49 worldwide in 2016, accounting for nearly one in 10 deaths, according to the study…" A recent article released by CNN presents scientific studies that show the negative effects of alcohol consumption on one's overall health.. delivering an opinion contrary to the largely pro-alcohol messages one typically finds in mainstream media.     SHOW NOTES   [9:15] Paul Introduces Jamie. Jamie is 39, from Alberta, Canada, and has been sober for 93 days.  She works in the school system and teaches fitness.  She is single, with two boys and dogs and cats.    [10:51] Give is a bit of background on your drinking. She started drinking when she was 12 years old.  She wanted to fit in with

Today we have Sarah with 162 days since her last drink.    Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  "When this happens, then I'll be okay."  You may already be living the live you have been dreaming about.  Try not to fall into trap of "when this happens, I'll be okay."  "When I get another month of sobriety", or "when I move to another town", or "when I get the right X" are all common examples of not living in the present moment.  Stop for a moment, take stock in the good things you have around you and try your best to find the magic and happiness you seek in the moment you're in, right now.  Once you bounce back from the effects of alcohol, you might just notice that you already have enough.   SHOW NOTES   [7:50] Paul Introduces Sarah. Sarah has been sober for 162 days.  Sarah is from England.  She is divorced, with two kids.  She is still figuring out what she does for fun.  She loves camping, nature, the outdoors.  She has a sober

Today we have Tamara with 88 days since her last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  "There is only one line we can cross that we can't come back from" The National Suicide Prevention Hotline – 1-800-273-8255 SHOW NOTES   [4:20] Paul Introduces Tamara, and she recaps her experience with relapse and suicidal thoughts. Tamara had a relapse after 48 days of sobriety.  She just moved to a new apartment.  She started the day running errands, then had a conversation with her sponsor.  She was alone, felt lonely and bought vodka.  She started to drink by herself.  She felt guilty because she is aware of the support structures that are in place, but she still witnessed herself resorting to alcohol to try to soothe her emotional pain.  She thought she had exhausted all of her options.  She began to have suicidal thoughts.  She recorded a goodbye message to her family.  She cut her wrist and sent the message.  Her parents received it

Today we have John with over 1 year since his last drink.  The Journey One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice – though the whole house began to tremble and you felt the old tug at your ankles. "Mend my life!" each voice cried. But you didn't stop. You knew what you had to do, though the wind pried with its stiff fingers at the very foundations, though their melancholy was terrible. It was already late enough, and a wild night, and the road full of fallen branches and stones. But little by little, as you left their voices behind, the stars began to burn through the sheets of clouds, and there was a new voice which you slowly recognized as your own, that kept you company as you strode deeper and deeper into the world, determined to do the only thing you could do – determined to save the only life you could save. By Mary Oliver   SHOW NOTES   [8:45] Paul Introduces John.   John is a musician from Helena, Montana.  He's been sober for o

Today we have Angie with 146 days since her last drink.    Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  "Alcohol gave me the wings to fly, then took away the sky" SHOW NOTES   [5:30] Paul Introduces Angie.   Angie is 36 years old, lives in Atlanta, GA.  She has been sober for 146 days and is the proud owner of 2 dogs.  She loves live music, the theater and the movies.  She enjoys cooking.  She now enjoys her own company.  [7:06] Give us some background about your drinking habits.  She never drank in high school or college.  She started when she was in her early 20's.  Drinking gave her confidence.  After a divorce in 2012, she attempted suicide and her drinking also ramped up.  She was having between 6-10 drinks a night.  She felt like she was barely surviving.  Her move to Atlanta did not cure her drinking, but it helped her to realize she had a problem.    [10:25] Did you ever have a rock bottom moment? She was sick and tired of being si

Today we have Jennifer with 568 days since her last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  Tracking your sobriety time – Do the numbers matter? To begin with, know that it's not a competition.  We're going for quality over quantity!  We quit alcohol because we want to improve our lives.  The end goal isn't in the numbers, but in the increase in one's quality of life.  Removing alcohol was the first step in a journey of getting to know ourselves, finding out what we really want from life and making the best of each and every day.  The real tracker is how you feel about who you are, where you're going and what is meaningful in your life.    SHOW NOTES   [9:52] Paul Introduces Jennifer.   Jennifer is 36 years old from Cleveland, OH.  She has 3 cats and runs a business walking dogs. [11:52] Describe to us your background with drinking. She started drinking at 15.  She always thought it was normal to binge drink.  She thought it was

Today we have Paul with 28 days since his last drink. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  The article mentioned in the episode introduction:  Science Increasingly Makes the Case for God - Wall Street Journal   SHOW NOTES   [10:57] Paul Introduces... Paul. Paul is from St. Paul, Minnessota.  He's 67 years old, retired.  He is married with 2 kids, and 2 grandchildren.  He hosts an internet radio show.  He enjoys cooking and films.    [13:18] Describe your drinking history. In his 20s, he feels that he was a normal drinker.  Sometimes to excess with a bad hangover, but usually a moderate amount.  During his first marriage, his wife didn't drink as much.  He started to experiment with stronger mixed drinks.  His second wife died of breast cancer, and he was a caretaker for her.  He used drinking to deal with the pain.  He married again a third time and didn't feel compelled to drink too much.  It started to creep back in.  His office c

Today we have Jason with 178 days since his last drink.  Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." – Ralph Waldo Emerson   "Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." – Robert Collier   "It's difficult to believe in yourself because the idea of self is an artificial construction. You are, in fact, part of the glorious oneness of the universe. Everything beautiful in the world is within you." – Russell Brand   "When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it." – Henry Ford   "If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking." – Zen proverb   "It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere." – Agnes Repplier   "If things go wrong, don't go with them." – Roger Babson   "Recovery is not for

Today we have Chris, with 96 days since his last drink. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  In sobriety, it's possible to become more in tune with the inner workings of our minds.  By stopping the intake of a numbing substance, our minds and bodies become more sensitive, and with that sensitivity comes a glimpse into the processes and systems that run under the hood. Our emotions and how we handle them (or, in early sobriety, often we will see how our emotions are handling us!), the physical sensations that return as our body heals, and how our subconscious mind has an impact on our every waking moment. In practices like meditation, we can begin to see how our thoughts can interrupt our every waking moment.  As we examine further, we can see that thoughts have a big impact on how we see ourselves, the world and, ultimately thoughts can make up who we are. To learn to manage your thoughts, follow Paul's first steps:  - Trust that yo

Today we have Jodi, with over 100 days since her last drink. Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.  You'd think that when dealing with something as simple and common as water, there couldn't be any confusion.  Water is water, right?  It turns out that not all waters are created equal.  Water comes in many forms and despite what you might think, the differences aren't just regional nomenclature.  There are distinct differences between these types of water, and while they are somewhat slight, they're enough to merit their own name.  Here's what you need to know: Mineral Water Sparkling mineral water comes from a natural spring which contains various minerals, like salts and sulfur compounds. It's defined by its "constant level and relative proportions of mineral and trace elements at the point of emergence from the source." Minerals aren't added to this water and neither is carbonation (with the exception of San Pellegrino, which has addi