Your Kickstarter Sucks

Daylight Savings WHAAA? The clock may be going totally wacko, but the calendar, my friends...well, the calendar is staying on point! Another Monday has appeared, and it's time to post the episode of YKS we all will love to listen to. Now is the point, of course, at which we all realize that JF has left his notes for the episode downstairs and doesn't want to go get them so we're gonna have to figure this out on our own. Folks, on today's show we've got a candle device that even Mike won't use, a hilarious TV show, or channel, or something, that's going to save Earth, and a new speaker idea that I wouldn't even play Justin Bieber's latest album on. Wow! We did it! And I didn't even have to go downstairs! Nice work everyone. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Oh Hello Dearie! Well, you'll be wanting to hear more YKS now then, won't you? My, my my. I suppose you'll

Whether you love a big piece of milk, having lots of Jameses, or the classic "kill your fuckin self game", Episode 241 of the Your Kickstarter Sucks Podcast is sure to please. Sorry I just watched The Meg and it was so good that I put off writing this episode description for too long and I had to go into SEO mode. We really could have done multiple Turteltaubs for Jesseuary! The guy knows what we like...when you think you have the big shark but then another, bigger shark comes along and eats you and the original big shark. Incredible stuff. Plus we got two Llama games on the show, which is more than usual. And really, many would say, two too many. To hell with them! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.YKS Premium! That's the place to get more YKS, if you've "prestiged" out of the currently available episodes. Or, hell, just want to support a boy and his dream to

Welcome to iPodcast, the very first podcast for your phone!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.You've heard all about it, you've read the articles, you've seen the awards. And now, Jesseuary is wrapping up over at the YKS Premium Patreon. We've got great guests, incredible games, and wall to wall analysis of some of Cinema's most overlooked films. The only problem is, there's no way to hear it! Oh wait a minute, what the HELL am I talking about? All you have to do is type in Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks or better yet, click that damn link, and be whisked away to the payment portal where we will ask but a humble $5 for years and years of content. Lock in at our $8 Squeeze Louise tier for even MORE bonus episodes, including this week's Jesseuary finale, featuring the boys from Podcast The Ride and The Sorcerer's Apprentice! Today's episode of YKS is sponsored b

Wow! It's already Episode 239, what a milestone! To celebrate the momentous occasion, we decided to do something different...we made this one funny. That's right, we packed this baby to the brim with jokes, goofs, gaffes, and gags, and if you don't double over laughing out of both ends by the time this one is through, we will refund you every damn dollar you've ever paid to listen to our (free episodes only, and actually not even those) show. On this week's episode, we two G.U.Y.s come up with some new twists on classic comics, smell a mummy, and meet a new friend, Mr. $10,000! Plus we got the latest Superman flick (looks good!), a novel way to deal with little buggy guys, and the most politically confusing BBQ sauce we've ever seen. All that and more, again free of charge so no one can get too mad about it, only on YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.***W@W

Well well well, if it isn't the thing I'm doing while the Super Bowl is on in the background...the episode description! On today's show we're smoking on that Grandma Weed, planning out the forthcoming Willisbember, and telling Deer Park where they can shove their so-called "shitty ass water bottle caps". Plus, we got a way to make drinking booze straight out of the bottle feel even grosser, a way to make smoking weed extremely uncool, and a way to make folding socks, uh, exactly as fun as it already was. How do they do it, folks? Through the power of Jesus Christ! Just kidding. It's from freakin $6 coffee that tastes like shit and has 4000000mg of sugar in it! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Do something nice for yourself this Valentine's Day...subscribe to YKS Premium! Jesseuary has yet to disappoint, and if it has, I don't know about it because I refuse to

Listen up dirtbags! It's time for another YKS. Oh yeah and by the way, you aren't dirtbags. You're actually the closest things we have to friends! And you mean a lot to us, you fucking dirtbags! Fuck you! On today's show, which must have been pretty funny because I did not have time to write down what was going on while we were recording it, we've got a NEW way of signing your name that doesn't make you look like an uneducated oaf, a $200 shoe you can never hoop in, somehow another poker thing, and the latest from the guy who came up with throwing the burrito around and whatever the blowing up kittens game is. Sounds like it was probably around a B+ episode, maybe less. Not bad!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Good news, everyone! (Futurama) Jesseuary continues over at YKS Premium! This week, we've got our friend Libby Watson on to solve the mysterious case of

Somebody said "There's a new episode of YKS!" lol. lmao. On today's show we're going full on Parent Mode with a look at a Christian comic book hero that could finally save the day, a new game of poker that might be able to do the same thing, and of course, some tarot cards with Eminem on them. Right twix...left twix...it really don't matter which side you're on, as long as you're armed with the shield of truth, the knowledge of how to make a website, and some vitamins you can drink. Hell, I don't know if you're gonna like it or not but at least there's some C-3PO in it. It's a new YKS! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Say it with me now: It's Jesseuary time! That's right, gang. Our annual celebration of the best/worst Hollywood has to offer has begun, and the only place to get it is at YKS Premium. This week we're joined by our friends Tom Walker and Demi Lard

Look to your right. Look to your left. Both of the people sitting next to you are Jon Voight, and they are both doing the most insane accent you've ever heard in your life. That's what these teachers in our woke schools want these days, and the Demonrat politicians are just cowardly enough to give it to them! Now what on God's green earth could I be talking about? There's only one way to find out. You're gonna have to go Blair Witch Mode and grab a Sausage McMuckin, and oh my God I just got a "too many characters" warning in this episode description box hahaha. This shit is long as hell (I wrote it in reverse order). ByeMusic for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Now folks, I won't presume to tell you what to do with your own money. But from time time, it's been asked, "Where do I go to get more YKS?" [citation needed] And by god, the only place I've ever found any more

On this week's YKS, we attempt to reconstruct what the show was about despite apparently throwing away the show notes, or maybe never even writing anything down in the first place. Oh wait. That's what I'm doing right NOW!!! Well if you go back and look at the sheet we write out before recording, it looks like we revisited the perfect work-from-home Kickstarter with fresh eyes, which I thought was a smart angle for this. And then we do 6 Kickstarters of course. There's a nasty game for nerds on there, there's a Trump thing, a scam, and a useless niche product designed by a space alien. Plus, we decide what kind of store we would be if we were going to be a store. Dollars to donuts there's some good riffs in here too...but don't take my word for it. Listen to my words! Of it! (By downloading the show now.)Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.For more YKS, head on o

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these podcasters from the swift completion of their appointed episodes! Just playing. If there was a bunch of heat or gloom we probably wouldn't do it. But there was a shitload of snow by Tennessee standards, and we still managed to turn on the computer and do our jobs. Incredible. On today's episode we're talking about, well, that dadgum post office demon Louis Dejoy, new seating concepts, copsucking comics, and as you can probably guess by looking at the title of the episode, air fryer apologia. All that and more on a very normal episode of YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.For more YKS, yeahhhh, you're gonna wanna head over to YKS Premium. Jesseuary is starting to take shape, and you're gonna love it, but in the mean time, we got bonus episodes comin out the wazoo over there, and they are ready to d

The first episode of 2022. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.For more YKS, you're gonna want to download YKS Premium over on Patreon. This past month, YKS Premium listeners got some real treats as we released some heretofore paywalled crossover episodes with professional podcasts Howell Dawdy's Fast Track and The P.O.D. Kast. But now it's back to the YKS slop. Join us for more Kickstarters, more goofin' off, more lines of resolution, and well, more. Five bucks, Eight bucks, whatever ya got, as long as it's one of those two amounts of bucks, you're gonna get some content. Join the familia of YKS Premium.This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by HelloFresh. Holy guacamole, they got some good food there. And heck, maybe they've even got some of that guacamole I just mentioned a second ago. But don't worry, eating these avocados won't keep ya from getting a house

Oppa still on Christmas Vacation style! The boys are back at it again with some YKS Premium Freemium content: an unearthed, probably-new-to-you classic, our interview (?) and Bloody Mary sesh with Birthday and Sloppy Boy Tim Kalpakis. Oh yeah, and there's a little bit extra from your boys thrown in there to sweeten the pot. Actually I just looked and it's like 30 extra minutes. We could have just done a new episode. Oh well. Pour 'em up and enjoy the show! And when you're done, click here to say why it's total bs we didn't do 30 more measly minutes to justify an all-new ep this week: Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksLook into the mirror, say "funny guest" three times, and what will appear? Writer and comedian Tim Kalpakis, of the Birthday Boys and Sloppy Boys, that's who! Tim pours us a couple of Bloody Marys and talks about some of our favorite topics: Bar Rescue, getting an MRI, and why Mike Mitchell is everybody's favorite. Plus, you know we had to get a former SNL writer (Lorne.) to help us punch up some J

Oppa Christmas Vacation Style! We're taking a week off, but still couldn't let ya leave empty handed...so allow us to introduce, from behind the paywall, an absolute banger of an episode from this past Miketober. It's The Stuff with our friends the Doughboys! Wiger and Mitch join us for a classic rewatch of a scary marshmallow movie, guess some ice cream flavors (pretty badly if I recall), and much more. For new listeners, enjoy this episode ad-free and the rest of Miketober over at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, and for those of you who have already heard this crap and hate our guts, please enjoy an all-new intro, outro, and yes, everyone's favorite part, advertisements. Music for Miketober is courtesy of Craig Dickman and Jesse Farrar. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer lola butt. Ads time! Well gang, since I'm one of those guys who can barely remember to zip up his fly on the way out the door, you know I ain't memorizing all 5,678 of my passwords. You know what I'm talking about? Well, good ne

Live from Nashville, Tennessee, it's YKS! That really could be what they're saying some day. Until then, of course, we simply have to march around our homes and say it ourselves. We have to say it to ourselves, to our pets, and we have to say it to the car warranty people who call us and make their phone numbers look like ours by borrowing the first 7 digits! But hopefully, someday, we can all know peace...when Mike and JF are the most famous people on the planet. But today is just as good! Because we've got an episode that hits all the big marks: The JF Position, living the Cone Life, and our worst xmas gifts. Plus, we're changing the sweeping paradigm with extreme advances in new combinatorial technology, solving the popcorn car problem once and for all, and finally figuring out how the hell freelancers are supposed to sit down. And not a moment too soon! I haven't gotten a W-2 form in like 7 years. My back hurts!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additi

Hear ye, hear ye! Well if it's anything like his last album, I think I'll pass! On today's programme, we're thumbing through Area Woman Magazine to read up on some Life Pro Tips, and we'll be talking about the guys I don't look like, which believe it or not, are all the wild and crazy and strange looking guys throughout history. Plus, we've got an update on using your balls like a penis, the shower routines of people who don't know how to shower, and finally figure out the right way to make a bicycle move around (shoot it??) It's one hell of a show, and I'm not just saying that because my livelihood depends on lots of people listening to it. I actually think it's good! And you can believe that because if you don't, Santa isn't coming this year. That's right...no presents!! And we LIKE those!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.For a present you get yourself with n

Monday morning! Quite possibly the worst time of the week, many were saying, until the saints and kings of YKS Inc. altered their release schedule to give us all a pep in our step. Thank God for those perfect souls! Today on the show, fate smiles upon us once again as the boys are talking Rob Rigglin', the Mither Beath Borger, and the Great Toast Rant. Plus, we got souls of inanimate objects to look at, new innovations in the butter shape space, and European guys hopping around in their living rooms for whatever reason. It's enough reason to hop in your time machine and listen to this episode over and over again. But you gotta start right now! Or else Mike wins!For more YKS this hall of daze season, you're gonna want to head on over to YKS Premium. There's so much extras over there you know we had to fix you a plate. Scoot your butt over there for exclusive video, bonus episodes, merch discounts, and more! This past week on YKS Premium, we once again locked horns with our listeners in a new edition of YKS Liv

We all crap and pee, sure. But what then? What then, I ask you?!?! Well there's an app for that, and oh yeah, the app is a bag. On today's show, Mike and JF are OFFICIALLY back on their bullshit, unless you don't like that kind of stuff, in which case it could not be any further from the truth. But! What they do have, whether you like it or not, is some ribald humor, informative discussion on various topics, and a friendship that will stand the test of time. Plus the crap and pee bags thing from the title of the episode. Check it out, gang, and if you don't love it, you can always listen to it anyway. Not everything is gonna be your favorite. Time to grow up! Want more YKS? Wow! Sorry to hear that? May I ask why not? Oh okay, yeah, I understand. Well, with all that being said, and by the way, I could not agree with you more, these guys are real scumbags. But with all that being said, they do offer weekly bonus episodes and more at the YKS Premium Patreon page. Obviously you won't be taking advantage of their

Now how's this for a Monday afternoon treat -- the thing that I should have posted on Monday morning! Oh well, I guess our old friend Garfield really had it right! And that's all I want to say about him for now. On today's show, Mike and JF go wild and crazy on some bad inventions, and oh yeah, there are no holds barred either! Download this "shiznit" right now for our thoughts on an even weirder form of "minting coins", an upgrade to your Tesla experience (that isn't trading it in for a real car), and playing poo poo games with other adults. Pull your pants up, lock your band's 5 trombones in the van, and grab your phone...it's time for YKS! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt. Title for this episode from Poochie D: "Just have it be whatever the fuck Mike says at about 45:47" -- you got it, pooch! For more YKS, you GOTTA head on over to the YKS Premium Patreon p

Scam alert! Scam alert! It's time for Mike and JF to don their investigative journalism hats and read the comments on a weird Kickstarter to see if someone else thinks its a scam or not. And maybe it's not, who knows. Not us, that's for sure. On today's episode we fix the entire movie industry, put fireworks likers in their place at long last, and destroy the entire oil industry. Not the really really bad one. Just the kinda bad one. So not really a huge win by us but it's only Monday so give us some time and we will deliver you another big W later in the week. All that, plus a Neighbor Insight, and much much more, only on Your Kickstarter Sucks (name in description for SEO purposes). Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.For more of this crazy nonsense we call YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon page, where 5 extra episodes a month, plus incredible video stylin

What if I told you...it was time to write the episode description, but you didn't want to? Would you shrink from the limelight and open another tab on the computer...or would you rise to the challenge, and write the best episode description of all time, a handful of paragraphs enshrined forever in the Episode Description Hall of Fame alongside the one that just says "Buh?" and the one with the copied synopsis from Avatar or whatever it was? Follow me down the rabbit hole and find out what your mind is truly made of...Today on the show we have a bunch of stupid projects to talk about and I think we do about 5 minutes on "poop worms". Enjoy. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Over on YKS Premium, Miketober continues...just kidding! Fuck that shit! We're sick of it! It's all over! We do have the official Squeeze Louise Halloween Mailbag dropping tomorrow, but after