Your Kickstarter Sucks

Wow, folks! It’s the last YKS before Christmas! Hopefully you have laid the 80s horror VHS tapes out by the old tube tv, taken one bite of the Delta-8 edibles and placed them on the Elvira plate, and filled up a cup with sour Gatorade. Soon, two annoying guys will be knocking on your front door asking if they can come in and use your bathroom! Will they be leaving presents? Perhaps! That depends on how you feel about a VR archery set, a new way to open up plastic bags, and a hat with a QR code on it that maybe orders a type of drink for you? Not sure. Who bought this crap, my weird uncle!? My uncles are all cool actually I just meant sometimes people have weird ones. I don’t know. Uncles take a beating around the holidays, don’t they? We need a day that’s safe for uncles. Uncle Day. We are looking into this very strongly! Have a good one. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Produce

Look, the thing about the episode today is that we got a lot of ideas about hot dogs. And chicken wings. I guess we were pretty hungry when we recorded the episode. But when it’s YKS Nights…that’s just the kind of crazy stuff you’re gonna get! On today’s show, we’re visiting the Kingdom of Fufu, but just for tonight only! Plus, we got some corny shoe stuff not even I can endorse, a way to stay warm at the office that’s NOT setting the Foreman Grill out the night before, and finally saving Canada from the thorny grip of woke! Gather your Missisaugan friends around the iPad…it’s time to listen to YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Here’s an excellent holiday gift for the person in your life who needs to see or have some good stuff: YKS Premium! Get a free month when you pay for a full year – It’s a Christmas miracle! This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by

Damn my feet smell really bad! That’s not pertinent to today’s episode, but I do think it’s a compelling way to start off the episode description, because you start to go…hmm..I wonder if JF”s feet were stinking during the episode? Or, like did they maybe start to stink right after? And if so, why? Was he out running around without socks? Probably not, it’s winter, but maybe he rushed out the door to get the paper and stepped in a dog’s poop. But then you gotta wonder, do I get the paper delivered? And whose dog poop was it? He called the shit poop! Anyway on today’s episode, our werewolf values are under attack! So we go all the way in on another piece of crap landfill robot pet, luggage for people who miss Bird scooters, and a child’s idea. Equal opportunity offenders here, gang. It would actually be unfair if we didn’t do it. And, in fact, the mainstream media wouldn’t, so that’s why we have to. It’s important that we’re like this!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and M

Well, Thanksgiving is over! All of the little cousins have gone on their walks, all of the uncles have done their politics, and all of the Karens have returned their half-eaten turkeys for store credit because they found a bird poop in the neckhole. Now what?! We all return to our schools or works?? And just sit there without eating a bunch of bread?? This sucks! Yeah, it does. That’s why they invented YKS. Hey, maybe this will kind of suck a little bit less. And if not, hey, free poop in the neckhole. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.More YKS! Many people are saying it. And many people are getting it as well, by going to Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks! Find bonus episodes, hundreds of hours of video, merch discounts, and more at the URL at the end of the previous sentence. jThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:NordVPN - VPNs are so clutch w

Now this is what I'm talking about right here! An Episode of YKS? And the word Episode is being capitalized now for no reason? Kind of weird, kind of cool. Plus it's Monday, my favorite day of the week! Damn. It sure doesn't get any better than this! On today's show we're celebrating our friends, Women, by making fun of some projects explicitly not targeting us loutish clods in any way, taking our hose everywhere we go, and using a little sucky toy to try to keep all the bleep from coming right out of our bloop! If that's not enough to get you to click on the link, maybe direct cash payments to your bank account will be? Let us know! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Oh my god, they're still doing YKS Premium! That's right folks, by somewhat popular demand, where it's like maybe more demand than you'd think but still there could be more demand overall, Mike and

It’s another episode of YKS starring Danny 2 Phones and his duo of lovable losers! On this week’s episode, we’re making a popcorn run with Orville Weedensmoker to the 4 Glomp Realm, and praying they’re isn’t actually something in my mouth even though it feels like there really is and it’s gonna make me throw up. Plus, we’ve a great new way to drop your infant, an idea that a pothead came up with and weirdly makes no sense, and monetizing retail cashier harassment. My god…How do they keep getting away with making such great episodes!!! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Want more YKS? Check out YKS Premium! Last week we were proud to present our Annual YKS Salute To Service. Just fucking kidding! We DID, however, break down all the politics going on in the world nowadays, which if you don’t know anything about them, suffice to say, they have been really crazy. Th

Hey look at THESE! It’s, give or take, about 120 minutes of unhinged goofiness from two old guys who should, frankly, know better. But we just don’t care! On today’s show, we’re munching on crispy rounds in the tractor forums, buying Penis Coins while they’re still on sale, making our Toaster confessions, and doing it all over the whirr of a tree trimmer. Our friends at Tree of Souls won’t be happy to hear that, of course, but for them, we’re pitching in an industrial strength AI ankle breaker, a painting tool for morons, a cure for boredom while driving a Tesla, and inexplicably, something Mike actually likes and wants to buy. And no flubs! (Sorry, Bryan)Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.I Stand With YKS Premium! For bonus episodes, ad-free YKS, our Squeeze Louise video feed, Pisscord access and more, there’s only one place to go: Hell! Just kidding, it’s YKS

OOOooooOOOOahhhhaaaOOOaaahhhwaaoooooohhhh! This is some scary ass damn crap! It’s the Halloween episode of YKS, and you already know the 666 pack is bursting at the screams with all kinds of horrifyingly bad Kill…uh, screamers! So whether you’re in your Nissan Hexterra or Tasting the Heath on a trick or treat run, crank up this very spooky edition of YKS, and beware the thumping caskets! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Miketober is over, and everyone is so sad! Well, tough titty! But one big, soft titty to remember is that these episodes are forever! Check out ALLL the gory, goopy goodness, with Rucking Fotten’s Jeff Haidaczuk, Dan O’Sullivan, Keith Buckley, and Howell Dawdy, at the YKS Premium Patreon. And now, back to even scarier programming: our normal crap! This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine sponsors: Honey - Coupon codes: Friend or Fo

Do I detect a new segment?? That Mike hates a lot?? Oh baby! I’m like a pig in shit. (Pigs like to be in shit, if you don’t know a lot about pigs or shit.) On today’s show we reflect on Enjoying the Film, HorseTimes, and, yes, Mike’s Joke Corner. That’s why I named the show that! Plus, we got iFood (finally!), a stupid fuckin pen, the Mikey Miles Fitness Routine, and I think there’s at least one Kickstarter in here that someone will get mad at us for talking about, so that’s good. But come on. With that thing. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Hey if you want to support the show and get a truly outrageous amount of content in exchange, head on over to YKS Premium, where we’re excited to show you the latest in cutting edge paid podcasts. This month we’re celebrating Miketober, with some of our favorite friends and nastiest movies. And next month we will be doing

Wow I just watched a good ass football game and now while I’m feeling all hyped up, I’m going to write up the episode description for my minor hit comedy podcast, Your Kickstarter Sucks! I bet this is what Michelangelo felt like, when he was really in a groove doing a painting or whatever. And maybe the place where he went to college won a big game. University of Italy defeats France State! And Michelangelo is flying over the stadium in one of his weird flying contraptions, smoking a big cigar. Wow, history sure was amazing! Anyway on today’s show we’re talking about toe condoms, the Ed Gein Card Game, and Producer Dan’s favorite state: Florida! Plus some really weird Kickstarters you are definitely going to want to listen to us talk about while you’re in the shower. So grab a ziploc and go to town on yourself with a rag…it’s YKS! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola b

Pre-recorded from Canada in our friend's secondary bedroom...it's YKS! This week on the show we take over BP Studios in unseasonably waaaaarm Vancouver, British Columbia, and force Blocked Party hosts John Cullen and Stefan Heck to participate in some main episode nonsense such as: talking to Producer Dan (off-mic), criticizing a perfect stranger's dreams and goals, and mispronouncing words in a way that gives plausible deniability to a claim that we were just joking. Plus! We got a very, uh, ambitious attempt to explain Chinese Traditional Medicine to Westerners, a podcast that's worse than most of ours probably, and a cat backpack that not even a catfreak would like! Sounds like enough to do a show about, huh? Yep, we thought so too.Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.(grabbing Sporange and regular podcast RSS feed Subscribers by the lapel, in a cool way but st

I'm in Canada! You can't make me do a long episode description cause I don't want to! On today's show we've got a streaming service that actually looks not too good (can you believe it!), a card game about poo (kinda?), and a guy making an entertainment product based on a meme from several months ago (member that??). Plus, some other stuff! I'm away, like I said, so gather up your crick coins and have some fun! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.MIKETOBER III starts Friday, and you can only get it at YKS Premium!! Be there, or have some guy slowly wander out into traffic in front of you! On this week's show, we're joined by Jeff Haidaczuk from Rucking Fotten to discuss...Sole Survivor (1984)!This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:HelloFresh! - Now that I'm traveling, I really miss my HelloFresh meals! Why didn't I get them sent up here to Canada w

It’s a SAD one today, folks, as we show up an absolutely insulting 9 minutes late to a funeral. And it’s for one of our best friends, who has been with us through hard times and soft…Taco Bell. Plus, we got horny monsters, and geometric cat shit, and a return to a certain awesome feline’s cinematic universe. All that and about 5-7 decent riffs that would be in a big YouTube compilation if we ever got our shit together enough to make one. And it’s free! So what the fuck!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.It’s almost the end of September…hm…what month comes after that, I wonder? Only one place to find out: YKS Premium. This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor: You know how they say there are 2.5M ants per person on Earth? Well what if you ate a big sandwich that had all those ants in it for lunch? Wouldn’t be very good, right? Yeah, that’s why

You ever get the feeling you’re…in a dream? We’ve all heard of Stranger Things, but that was just a show…right? On today’s episode, the thin line between reality and…something else begins to fray. And YKS may never be the same. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Want more YKS? Yep. I betcha do. Then you’re gonna want to head on over to patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and sign up for YKS Premium – Da Best Deal In Da Biz (™) Last week, we had the great David Roth on to preview NFL Week 2 and put Dumpy Trump in his cheesetacular place (jail?). This week, you’ve got even MORE episodes to look forward to – this one will probably be about the Woke Pilots we talked about on today’s show and some bad Kickstarters that Missed The Cut, but I’ll let ya know when we release it. Plus, we can’t forget the Squeeze Louise mailbag coming out at the end of the month – all in bea

On today’s episode, we got some good ass shit goin, okay? If you like $50 bills and ethical dogfighting, you’re gonna like this episode, alright? And if you’re into tape measures that can store all your measurements, putting baseball cards in coffee beans, and flushing bags of dog shit down the toilet, you’re gonna be doin’ just fine for this one too. There’s something for everyone here this week, as long as they like at least one of those specific things and don’t hate one of the other ones so much that it takes away from their enjoyment of the one they do like. Got it?!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.For more YKS Premium, head on over to YKS Premium. Oh crud. Hang on. I think I messed up! I was supposed to say that differently! But you get the idea. Support the show on Patreon for ad-free episodes, hundreds of hours of bonus content, and more. Last week we

Hey just so you know, the movie I was trying to think of was The Void. It doesn’t come up until way later in the episode, and it does seem like I’m about to get it but honestly I don’t. I get kinda close and then about 5 minutes after we’re done, I figure it out. It ain’t all happy endings, folks. Anyway on today’s show, we’re tossing and turning over Dan’s Proposition, oh and we’re sleepkicking a little bit sure, and we’re telling you why Bill Gates stuck us all with Micro$uck Winblows. Plus a bunch of crap to help you sleep different and eat weirder. It’s YKS time baby!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.I looooooove YKS Premium so much…I might just marry it! And you are invited to the ceremonies. You can be a guest with access to hundreds of hours of bonus audio content, a member of the wedding party, privy to tons of video episodes and a special VIP Squeeze L

Monday morning...oh shucks. I was just getting to love the weekend, and now it's gone! Maybe Monday should be the weekend too. Then we'd start the week on Tuesday, nice and fresh. I guess then Tuesday would be the new Monday. Garfield would be fucking pissed, but who cares about that racist? That's right, Garfield the cat was racist. I mean, probably, right? That was a long time ago. It would almost be surprising if he weren't. Piece of shit. Anyway on today's show we've doing a lunchbag takeover with our friend Dan the Glizzy King, getting favstar notifications for our weather reports, and doing the world's shortest update on an old Kickstarter. Plus, Master P is on this one. Remember that guy? Yep, we did too. That's why we did it. Anyway, check it out. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Often it has been said, "YKS is the cure for the common podcast"! And by

YKS freaks...you're gonna love this one. Mike is here, JF too, and oh yeah...a guy by the name of PRODUCER DAN shows up? Heard of him?? Thought so. It's a jam-packed ep this week, as the boys are talkin robotic lawncare, the future of porno, and a third thing you're gonna have to hear to believe. Plus...Ask Yoda App?? Someone got there before us? What the hell?? Fuck! So grab the Stinker Sauce and start squirtin' it around...it's a new YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Ready to take this YKS thing up a notch? Check out YKS Premium. It's so much fun, it should be illegal! But if it was, it would be like a super huge problem for me. It would be incredibly bad. Like, life-ruining. So let's call our senators, gang. Or whatever. This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Backbone - Hey you got any games on your phone? Well now you do. Backbone'

Damn! I need a low-consumption and energy-saving ice-making cooling cup. But where in the hell…oh! I guess I can get it just about every week on Kickstarter: the website that used to be about cryptocurrency, we think. Gang, on today’s show we’re gettin the monchies, okay? We’re going eemee meemee mimee mow, okay? And we’re extracting chicken tendons like there’s no tomorrow. But god willing, there will be a tomorrow. Because there has to be. Because there needs to be. And if there’s not, we’ll make one. For everyone. What the fuck? I don’t know why I said that, sorry. I think I downloaded the Kamala Harris program or something. Anyway enjoy the program. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.YKS Premium is so much fun…YKS Premium is Number One! That’s sort of an alternate history theme song. In a timeline where I wrote the theme songs and really didn’t spend too muc

You know, it’s not every day that a brand new episode of YKS comes out and immediately gets downloaded to your phone, and you let it suck up 100mb of space while you wait for some bad chores to zone out during. It’s actually every Monday, and as luck would have it, that’s the day of the week that today is! So we put together some questions for our resident Earologist, named the TV Bitch, and remembered fondly the Music City Miracle, plus exposed cancel culture, ate some panties, and made some songs with a computer. Alright, I think that’s good enough to fold laundry to. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt. YKS Premium! It seems hard to believe at times, but there is even more YKS available for listening and viewing! Check us out over at Patreon to catch up on YKS Beach Party, to see our faces move around when we talk, and get our exclusive mailbag episodes! Comin