We Hate Movies

On this week's episode, the gang tears into the completely ridiculous, total disgrace, live action/animation hybrid, Space Jam! Why is this movie about everyone in the universe bowing before Michael Jordan? If they're from our universe, why do these aliens look animated and not like real-life aliens? And what's with all the "slave" talk? PLUS: Those are some realistically drawn butt-cheeks on that Monstar... Space Jam stars Michael Jordan, Wayne Knight, Bill Murray, Larry Bird, Charles Barkley, Patrick Ewing, Muggsy Bogues, Larry Johnson, Shawn Bradley and a bunch of sub-par third generation Looney Tunes voice actors; directed by Joe Pytka. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On the return of WHM On-Screen, the guys fulfill their promise from last year and release a conversation about the fantastic conclusion of Mad Men! Hear as they gush over the final scene! Listen as they ponder what happened to poor, Bob Benson! And laugh as they speculate about Don's plan to release an army of dead-inside Don Draper drones all across the country! WHM On-Screen is a show where we talk about different TV shows, current films in release, or any other film-related topic we can think of. For more episodes, visit whmpodcast.com! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang has nothing but love for 1989's incredible white guy ninja masterpiece, Blind Fury! Why do all movies with blind characters have other characters "test" them to see if they're actually blind? How lame is this terrible wimp of a villain, MacCready? And how is Chris not impressed by a blind guy chopping a flying squash in half? PLUS: How many Academy Award-winning films have ripped this movie off? Answer: At least two. Blind Fury stars Rutger Hauer, Terry O'Quinn, Brandon Call, Noble Willingham, Randall 'Tex' Cobb, Nick Cassavetes Meg Foser, and Shô Kosugi; directed by Phillip Noyce. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This month we open up the old WHM Mail Bag and read letters about awkward dates at the movies, people with horrendous movie theater etiquette and one amazing mother who did not stop busting on her son for taking her to see From Dusk Till Dawn!   If you've got a question for the gang or have a weird, awkward or crazy story you'd like read on the air, write in the to the Mail Bag! Drop us a line at [email protected]! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

[Note from 2024: We were lucky enough to record this convo with Gilbert at his home back in 2015 and honestly, hanging out with him will forever be a career highlight for us. He was so funny and so kind. His wife, Dara, was also incredibly nice to us, just three creeps she found hanging out in her living room one morning. We continue to miss him terribly. Please enjoy listening to us as we're just happy to be there as Gilbert is non-stop hilarious! - Andrew] On this very special episode, the gang sits down to chat with the legendary Gilbert Gottfried! Just as we'd hoped, our talk jumped all over the place, hitting such topics as Adolf Hitler, The Twilight Zone, some of Gilbert's early impression bits, the Universal Monster films, our mutual disapproval of The Jackie Gleason Show, and, of course, several of Gilbert's hilarious appearances in film and television, including: the Problem Child movies, Beverly Hills Cop II, Highway to Hell and the live action Superboy show!  Much thanks to Gilbert for coming on

On this week's episode, the gang gets angry as they tear apart the 1996 give-hope-to-children-of-divorce comedy, House Arrest! Just how is that all these parents are dumb enough to fall for this? How has no one pointed out that our protagonist is a total psycho? And the Küb is most definitely getting the chair for this! PLUS: People were definitely having sex in that basement. House Arrest stars Jamie Lee Curtis, Kevin Pollak, Kyle Howard, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Wallace Shawn, Christopher McDonald, Ray Walston and Mooky Arizona; directed by Harry Winer. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, it's a real We ❤️ Movies situation as the gang casts a spell over 1980's suburbia in the cheese-fest teen comedy, Teen Witch! What would a girl-centric Teen Wolf have looked like? Could that sexophone get any sexier? And how was that teacher not fired immediately? PLUS: JFK's ghost haunts the Bush I White House! Teen Witch stars Robyn Lively, Zelda Rubinstein, Dan Gauthier, Mandy Ingber, Shelley Berman, Marcia Wallace & Dick Sargent; directed by Dorian Walker. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang tackles the homophobic, racist, sexist cinematic cesspool that is 1989's Loverboy! What's with those gross fake mustaches in that pizzeria? Why does that delivery guy instantly turn into T-1000? And how in the world would this girl even consider getting back together with this gigolo? PLUS: Will Riker has a real problem with Troi's guest list for their wedding. Loverboy stars Patrick Dempsey, Kate Jackson, Dylan Walsh, Barbara Carrera, Robert Picardo, Kirstie Alley and Carrie Fisher; directed by Joan Micklin Silver. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this month's WHM Mail Bag episode, the gang discusses movies ruined by awkward parents, adulterous trips to roller coaster parks and the tale of Andrew's weird, late night encounter with legendary film critic, Gene Shalit is finally told!   Do you have a burning question for the WHM gang? Is there a bizarre story you want to share on the air? Then write in to the WHM Mail Bag - [email protected]! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this episode of Animation Damnation, the gang mellows out with an episode of the stoner-friendly children's cartoon, Denver the Last Dinosaur. The episode under review is "Denver Makes the Grade" which originally aired October 15th, 1988. On this episode, we try to answer questions like: Just how high are these kids? Why would bullies and stoners care so much about winning a science fair? Where are these kids' parents? And is that Larry Clark lurking in the background? PLUS: Turns out they were just watching The Flintstones the whole time! For more information on Animation Damnation, check out our Patreon! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this very special 200th episode, the gang's all here to discuss two of their favorite show-fodder actors, Arnold Schwarzenegger and James Belushi in Walter Hill's Chicago-set, international incident-causing, blowhard-blabbering Red Heat! Just marvel at how good this film makes the Soviet Union look! And why was Jim Belushi chosen as the ambassador for America in this? PLUS: Check out that nude bath house fight! Red Heat stars Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Belushi, Peter Boyle, Larry Fishburne, Brion James and Gina Gershon; directed by Walter Hill. WHM would definitely not have gone this far were it not for listeners like you. We're so excited to hit this milestone, but even more excited for what's to come. Thanks so much for listening and continue to help us spread the good WHM word! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang swaps faces with John Travolta and Nicolas Cage in the insane 90's action flick, Face/Off! Why not just suck it up and set this film in the future? Why give Travolta a haircut after you cut his face off? And how was Joan Allen not hip to the alternate genitalia? PLUS: Sequel when? Face/Off stars John Travolta, Nicolas Cage, Joan Allen, Gina Gershon, Alessandro Nivola, Dominique Swain and Nick Cassavetes; directed by John Woo. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang goes to court with Demi Moore and Alec Baldwin in the ridiculous legal thriller, The Juror! Why does Alec Baldwin's mafia fixer character have a Jackal-esque nickname? Could Anne Heche be a bigger Dead Meat side character? And what is with all the box puns? PLUS: That. Dragon. Video game. The Juror stars Demi Moore, Alec Baldwin, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Anne Heche, Tony Lo Bianco, Lindsay Crouse, Michael Rispoli and the legendary James Gandolfini; directed by Brian Gibson. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang heads to Chicago by way of Kentucky to roughhouse with Patrick Swayze and Liam Neeson in the action packed family drama, Next of Kin! How many ponytails does Swayze have going at once here? Why cast Liam Neeson as a man born and bred in the rich hills of Kentucky coal country? And why is the Chicago mafia specializing in cigarette dispensers and pinball machines? PLUS: Is that noted comedian Ben Stiller playing a Sicilian gangster? Next of Kin stars the legendary Patrick Swayze, Liam Neeson, Bill Paxton, Ben Stiller, Helen Hunt, Michael J. Pollard and Internet madman, Adam Baldwin; directed by John Irvin. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this WHM Mail Bag, the gang talks about weird dog walking incidents, horrendous teachers (it never ends!) and even a few awkward projection booth nightmares.  Do you have a question for the WHM gang? Or maybe a bizarre movie-related story or show-inspired tale you'd like to share? Then write in to the Mail Bag - [email protected]! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang hits the foggy streets of San Francisco to track down a serial killer with Ashley Judd and Andy Garcia in the totally macho cop flick, Twisted! Oh, of course we start with the creepy character actor from Se7en! How does Ashley Judd not figure out something's up with that wine? And how bad must Andy Garcia's apartment smell being near all those sea lions?! PLUS: Hey, fuck you, Delmarco! Twisted stars Ashely Judd, Andy Garcia, Samuel L. Jackson, David Strathairn, Camryn Manheim, Mark Pellegrino, Titus Welliver and Se7en and The Guest's Leland Orser; directed by Philip Kaufman. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this episode of Animation Damnation, the gang talk about an episode of the recycling superhero adventure show, Captain Planet and the Planeteers! The episode in question is "Talkin' Trash" which originally aired November 13th, 1993. What were the odds we found the one episode of this show with the least amount of Captain Planet? Did we really need the L.A. riots to be "tackled" on this cartoon? And did that kid really fall off a train and die? For more information about Animation Damnation subscribe on Patreon! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang heads to the surface of the moon to tackle the low budget, sci-fi dud, Moontrap! How do you not cast Bruce Campbell as your hotshot hero? Why couldn't they do at least one scene with rear projection instead of small, toy models? And what the hell is that thing sitting on Chekov's head? PLUS: Coming this summer, Walter Koenig stars in, Tiny Die Hard! Moontrap stars Walter Koenig, the great Bruce Campbell and Leigh Lombardi; directed by Robert Dyke, written by Tex Ragsdale which is, without a doubt, the greatest name of all time. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang takes a look at Whoopi Goldberg's Beverly Hills Cop knock-off, Fatal Beauty! Is this as conspicuous as an undercover detective can get? Why was that gentleman eating glass? And once Cher dropped out and the Whoopster was cast, why didn't they change the character from being Italian? PLUS: The guys find Sam Elliot's lion mane... Hypnotic. Fatal Beauty stars Whoopi Goldberg, Sam Elliot, Rubén Blades, Harris Yulin, James Le Gros and Brad Dourif; directed by Tom Holland. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang joins the Sideshow Network just in time to discuss the totally lame and completely joke-less sequel, Teen Wolf Too! Who was demanding sports stay in the story? Is Michael J. Fox's character supposed to be dead in this movie? And who on Earth would think it's a good idea to befriend Stiles? PLUS: The show's recorded in New York, which means it's time, once again, to yell at people out the window! Teen Wolf Too stars Jason Bateman, Kim Darby, John Astin, Paul Sand, James Hampton, Mark Holton, Estee Chandler and Stuart Fratkin as "Stiles"; directed by Christopher Leitch. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies