We Hate Movies

On the final episode of the Worst of 2015, the gang gets real tough and real magical as they sit through the magically tough fantasy action thrill ride--question mark?--The Last Witch Hunter! What's with Vin Diesel saying "magic" every six seconds? Does Michael Caine stand in any of his scenes? And why couldn't they hire an actual human being to play the Witch Queen? PLUS: Your favorite Ghostbusters lines, but with the word "bee". The Last Witch Hunter stars Vin Diesel, Rose Leslie, Michael Caine, Elijah Wood, and Ólafur Darri Ólafsson; directed by Breck Eisner.Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On this month's Mail Bag, the gang reads letters from folks who want to become professional wrestlers, had their Hateful Eight audience lose its cool, frequented a multiplex with wretched projection, and even, oh boy, shit their pants at the movies! If you want your questions answered on the air, or have some strange tales you want to tell--or just need to work through some trauma from your past--write in to the mail bag: [email protected]!Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On this week's episode, the Worst of 2015 month continues as the gang levels down to watch one of two Adam Sandler movies to come out last year, the totally inept Pixels! Why did we need the first fifteen minutes of this movie to explain what arcades and video games are? Why does this screenplay think playing video games is comparable to firing massive weaponry and driving race cars IRL? And why would you let a creepy cable guy type fella sit with you in your bedroom closet? PLUS: Reelect President Hot Dog in 2020! Pixels stars a tired Adam Sandler, Michelle Monaghan, Peter Dinklage, Josh Gad, Brian Cox, Sean Bean, Jane Krakowski, Dan Aykroyd, and Kevin James as the President of the United States--somehow; directed by Chris Columbus.Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On this week's episode, the gang continues their Worst of 2015 month with an off-brand family film, the wrestling dog epic, Russell Madness! How many dogs-doing-things movies will this same company make? Why doesn't this arena rent out to other events besides wrestling? And can this talking monkey live forever? PLUS: Creepy Frasier cosplay! Wait, what? Russell Madness stars John Ratzenberger, Mason Vale Cotton, Fred Willard, Mckenna Grace, Will Sasso, and Mac from Night Court himself, Charles Robinson; directed by Robert Vince. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On the first episode of 2016, the gang kicks off a month-long look at some of the worst films of 2015, and what better way to start than with one of the most unnecessary films to ever exist, Entourage! Why did they not bother to put any kind of conflict in the film at all? When did E become such a scumbag? And watch your rug around that helicopter, Ari! PLUS: Mark Wahlberg & the Herculoids' dear friend, Goober, struggles with the big C. Entourage stars Adrian Grenier, Kevin Connolly, Kevin Dillon, Jerry Ferrara, Jeremy Piven, Emmanuelle Chriqui, and a slew of endless celebrity cameos; directed by Doug Ellin.  Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this episode of Animation Damnation, the guys chat about the ridiculous Rankin & Bass holiday special, Rudolph's Shiny New Year, which originally aired December 10th, 1976. Is this anything more than a cheap cash grab off the success of the first Rudolph film? What happened to that camel with a clock in its back? And could they not think of a better lesson than "suck it up and deal"? PLUS: A sneak preview of some 2016 Animation Damnation plans! Rudolph's Shiny New Year stars Red Skelton, Frank Gorshin, Billie Mae Richards, and Morey Amsterdam; directed by Jules Bass and Arthur Rankin Jr. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this month's WHM Mail Bag episode, the guys read stories about obnoxious movie theater tag alongs, horrendously embarrasing movie moments (and the friendships that are tested during them), and one extreme example of eating healthy. PLUS: Was there a Muppet in The Passion of the Christ?   If you want your weird stories read or questions answered on the air, write in to the WHM Mail Bag: [email protected]! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this episode of WHM On-Screen: Long story short - we liked it a lot. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On the Christmas episode of We Hate Movies, the guys check out the ridiculous holiday classic(?), Santa Claus: The Movie! What's with the opening of the film featuring Santa and Mrs. Claus freezing to death? Where did these elves come up with this Santa idea in the first place? And why in the world are we waiting OVER AND HOUR to bring John Lithgow into the film? PLUS: Jesse "The Body" Ventura weighs in on the movie... and a lot more. Santa Claus: The Movie stars Dudley Moore, John Lithgow, David Huddleston, and Burgess Meredith; directed by Jeannot Szwarc.  Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, Star Wars Week continues here at We Hate Movies as the guys talk about the much-longer-than-Star Wars Star Wars film, Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones! Marvel at the horrendous dialogue! Be confused by the convoluted plot! And stick around for the outdated special effects! PLUS: Turns out Cliegg Lars is the biggest slime ball in the galaxy. Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones stars Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman, Hayden Christensen, Christopher Lee, Samuel L. Jackson, Frank Oz, and Ian McDiarmid; directed by George Lucas. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this special WHM On-Screen rerun to kick off Star Wars Week here at WHM, the gang revisits the time they traveled to a galaxy far, far away around the holidays and found The Star Wars Holiday Special! Remember this beloved holiday conversation as Andrew, Chris and Eric chat about the potential of a Vince McMahon-run wookie football league, Chewbacca's humble domestic goals, and the possibility of using this wretched special as a sonic weapon at Gitmo! The Star Wars Holiday Special stars Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Anthony Daniels, Peter Mayhew, Kenny Baker, Bea Arthur, and Art Carney; directed by Steve Binder. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On We Hate Movies' 5th anniversary show, the gang sits down to chat about the unnecessary - but not terrible! - sequel, Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey! Witness the rare George Carlin action sequence! Marvel at the horribly dated slurs! Bow before the annoying and cheesy Grim Reaper! PLUS: Eric vs. Frank Welker comes to a head! Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey stars Keanu Reeves, Alex Winter, George Carlin, William Sadler, Joss Ackland, and Pam Grier; directed by Peter Hewitt. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang heads to Dark Heart's summer camp in the totally batshit insane, Care Bears Movie II: A New Generation! What's with the whole retconning of the Care Bear universe? What's the big deal about becoming 'Camp Champ'? And who in the world thought the idea of a demon stuffing the souls of beloved creatures into rubies was appropriate for three year-olds? PLUS: WARNING - We know some of you listen to this with your kids. Despite the film selection, make no mistake - this episode hits about an 11 on the Sleaze-o-Meter! Cares Bears Movie II: A New Generation stars Hadley Kay, Chris Wiggins, Cree Summer, Alyson Court, and Michael Fantini; directed by Dale Schott. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang goes back to the beach to spend another couple days with Rich, Larry, and old Bern in Weekend at Bernie's II! How did they not have a more... accurate production design with that porno theater? What happened with Gwen? And how is this zombie not talking? PLUS: Sweet Jeff Dahmer calls a couple customer service lines. Weekend at Bernie's II stars Andrew McCarthy, Jonathan Silverman, Terry Kiser, Troy Byer, Barry Bostwick, Tom Wright, Steve James, and Novella Nelson as "The Mobu"; directed by Robert Klane. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this month's WHM Mail Bag, the gang reads some fan letters sparking a chat about accidentally returning porno to the video store, Freddy vs. Jason sex play, throwing up at the movies, as well as a letter from one happy couple who found love with the help of WHM. If you want one of your crazy stories read on the air, or have a question you need us to answer, write in to the Mail Bag - [email protected]! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this episode of WHM On-Screen, the gang sits down to have a quick chat about Spectre. A slight case of "Different Opinions on We Hate Movies" turns up as the guys debate things like the merits of all the franchise references, that Sam Smith song, Bond's Scooby team, Daniel Craig's potential return, and, of course, their personal rankings of all the Craig films. PLUS: Was that art director into tentacle porn or what? Spectre stars Daniel Craig, Christoph Waltz, Léa Seydoux, Ralph Fiennes, Monica Bellucci, Ben Whishaw, Naomie Harris, Dave Bautista, Andrew Scott, Rory Kinnear, Jesper Christensen, and Dame Judi Dench as Jamie Kennedy; directed by Sam Mendes.Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On this week's episode, the gang kicks off a two week Bernie-a-thon with the coked-out, bad decision-filled nonsense-fest, Weekend at Bernie's! How do you create such lackluster mafia characters? How does no one see how creepy Silverman's character is? And how is Bernie's corpse not torn to shreds by the end of all this? PLUS: Vince McMahon and Stone Cold Steve Austin pen the script for a Bernie's remake. Bah gawd! Weekend at Bernie's stars Jonathan Silverman, Andrew McCarthy, Terry Kiser, Catherine Mary Stewart, and Don Calfa; directed by Ted Kotcheff. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this episode of Animation Damnation, the guys tackle the totally wrongheaded James Bond Jr.! The episode in question, "Garden of Evil", which aired December 4th, 1991, raises such burning questions as why is James Bond Jr. the nephew of James Bond? How was it okay to make Dr. No this racist looking in the 90s? And how come every stupid kid on this show has to be related to an actual Bond franchise character?  PLUS: Your fair share of Jim Webb jokes! Some might say it's even more than your fair share! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this episode, the gang heads back to the comic world to chat about the disasterous, embarrassing, lazy, multi-cut, train wreck, Supergirl! Why does Faye Dunaway need to be a witch in this movie? What's with the instant love spell excluding dudes? And is Zaltar the biggest pervert in the galaxy? PLUS: How about a squirt? Supergirl stars Helen Slater, Faye Dunaway, Peter O'Toole, Hart Bochner, Maureen Teefy, Mia Farrow, Marc McClure, Brenda Vaccaro, and Peter Cook; directed by Jeannot Szwarc. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

On this week's episode, the gang gets all dolled up in their best tuxedos and terrible hair pieces to chat about the 1983 (unofficial) Bond film, Never Say Never Again! Could they not pony up the extra dough for the traditional shoot at the camera opening? Why bother trying to make Bond clean and sober? And did Blofeld really invent YouTube? PLUS: James Bond just loves cold Burger King. Never Say Never Again stars Sean Connery, Klaus Maria Brandauer, Max von Sydow, Barbara Carrera, Rowan Atkinson, Bernie Casey, and Kim Basinger; directed by Irvin Kershner. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies