Junkfood Cinema

Brian and Cargill and Brian and Cargill continue their temporal progression through The Denzel Watchingthon with a Tony Scott flick Brian had never seen...at least he thought he hadn't.Can you imagine solving a crime by peeking through time? Or if that sentence didn't rhyme? Denzel partners with Batman to stop Alt-Right Jesus in a thriller steeped in tragedy from the word go. If you think you’ve already heard this episode, listen again. Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

It’s virtual insanity as the Denzel Watchingthon brings Brian and Cargill face to interface with Virtuosity.Famous for featuring great actors having a great time surrounded by not-so-great effects, Virtuosity is fifty terabytes of bonkers uploaded into our limited RAM. The guys chat about Denzel’s dreads, the fragility of glass death, and why Russell Crowe is accidentally one of the best Jokers ever! Download at your own risk!  

Brian and Cargill continue the #DenzelWatchingthon in one of the only instances where this podcast discusses subs without ordering sandwiches.Tony Scott’s Crimson Tide is an incredible work of masterful, claustrophobic tension featuring arguably cinema’s greatest squaring off of big screen alpha males.It’s a movie we love, the Navy hated, and that is shockingly based on a true story in which this exact plot actually happened!Take a dive with us. Download, listen and share!

Greg MacLennan returns as JFC kicks off the Denzel Watchingthon, a month-long celebration of all things Denzel! We begin with Ricochet,  a remake of Cape Fear that is far trashier than the trashy Cape Fear remake that came out the same year.An obsessive action flick from the director of Highlander, Ricochet throws logic out the window and throws everything at the audience but Ice-T. Just kidding, they throw him too.Things get wild as the crew discusses dueling Lithgows, Broomites, and the creation of the deSouzaverse.Get ready to get plastered at the sidebar!

Brian & Cargill wrap up Gals Who Rock with a iconoclastic jaunt down the filthy streets of Times Square.But don’t worry, they have The Sleaze Sisters, Abel Ferrara, and a scenery-gargling Tim Curry to keep them company. The start of Alan Moyle's music trilogy (with Pump Up the Volume and Empire Records), Times Square plants the seeds of Moyle’s fascination with strong women, broken youth, and fading institutions. The guys discuss the runaway friendship of the leads, the soundtrack, and playing Movie Geek Bingo on the marquees of 42nd Street.Punk rock, strip club house bands, Q The Winged Kismet, and more!It’ll brain your blows out!

Ladies and Gentlemen, whether you like it or not, Brian & Cargill return for another installment of their Gals Who Rock series. This week, they head to the seediest buffets, ice cream shops, and anywhere else they can hear the punk rock stylings of Hedwig and the Angry Inch.Resident musical expert Windy Bowlsby returns to Junkfood HQ to breakdown the spectacularly unique 2001 indie film adapted from one of the most celebrated musicals of the millennium. The trio discuss the stage-to-screen differences, the return of John Cameron Mitchell to the halls of JFC, and why sometimes a gummi bear is just a gummi bear.Put on some makeup, turn up the eight-track, and get angry! Download, listen, and share!

With long tails and ears for hats, Brian & Cargill continue Gals Who Rock month with Josie and the cats. How this meta gem was overlooked is inFURiating. From the writers/directors of Can't Hardly Wait came this self-aware sendup that was Lord & Miller before Lord & Miller!The guys discuss the odd connection to last week's Fabulous Stains, the hilarious product placement gags, and why Josie and the cats might not be Y2K compliant. All this plus, backdoor lovers and so much Cumming.Meow.

Greetings punks and skunks! Brian and Cargill kick off their month-long Gals Who Rock series with a lost punk classic. Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains didn't get a wide theatrical release, and it didn't turn up on home release for 26 years. When the guys say it's a lost classic, they're not lying, they're professionals.The film features several superstars at the dawn of their careers, including Diane Lane, Laura Dern, and a sexy young Ray Winstone that has both hosts scrambling to put the nitro back in the box. The Fabulous Stains, like the eponymous band there in, has something biting to say about music, about fame, and about identity. It's raucous and fun despite being so cynical that the happy ending (tacked on two years after shooting had wrapped) is somehow more cynical than the intended bleak ending.All this, plus The Dead Rooneys, awkward Thanksgivings at the Dern house, and the guys open a package on air that almost definitely possibly isn't related to a kidnapping.

In space, no one...apparently pays much attention to copyright lawsJanUary concludes with Sean Connery trying to maintan law and order on one of the moons of Jupiter while also avoiding catching the space clap in Outlander.It's not just High Noon in space, it's High Noon/Serpico/Chinatown/Alien in space! Ok, granted, Alien is already in space. But it’s the second biggest influence on Outland behind one of cinema’s greatest westerns.Brian and Cargill discuss these influences, the unexpected Cheers reunion, and why you should never EVER roast the Steak-ums.

Here we are, born to be Burger Kings.Continuing JanUary, Brian and Cargill draw their swords in defense of The Highlander. An immortal classic! Or at least a classic about immortals. They discuss the mythology, the accents, and the fact that when it comes to this franchise, there should be only one.Queen slays Sting, Cargill gets Assanted, and MacLeod takes a bite out of crime. Gather around for the quickening! 

This s**t just got real!We hadn’t covered one of the greatest action movies of all time and you Junkions took us to court! Now, at long last, Brian & Cargill ride and/or die with BAD BOYS II!The guys discuss the balls-out action set pieces, the interesting twist on the lead character dynamic, and the absurd amount of great character actors in BAD BOYS II’s periphery.They also question the wisdom of a second Bay of Pigs, Brian pleads guilty to past distaste for this flick, and the guys pitch the ultimate franchise crossover that never was.Shake a tail feather! Download, listen, and share now!

Brian & Cargill kick off JanUary with the first fan-curated film of the month: Darkman. In 1990, Sam Raimi delivered us a superhero so emotionally unstable as to make Batman look like Santa Claus.The guys discuss all the ways in which Darkman was Raimi's dry run for directing Spider-Man a few years later, right down to the montage work and the Danny "Elf Man" Elfman score. They also point out the relationship between Darkman, Batman, The Shadow, and...Lon Chaney?Who is Darkman? Listen to this episode and find out!Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Saving the best for last, Brian & Cargill warp up JCVDecember with Lionheart! Van Damme shows some actual acting chops as he fights for family, fights for survival, fights...in Jeans?Part Rocky, part Hard Times, part Street Fighter (much more so than the actual Street Fighter movie he starred in), Lionheart is the best non-meta JCVD flick, and we’ll work-boot-kick anyone who says otherwise!

In the distant past of 2004, and the even slightly distanter past of 1994, one man had the courage to travel back in time for justice...and to brandish a sick ass mullet!Brian and Cargill upset the spacetime continuum as JCVDecember explores the ageless excellence of Timecop. Ron Silver devours scenery, balloon men do the splits, and Mia Sara might be a Highlander.All this plus the guys discuss the petty ways they would personally profit from time travel and Van Damme keeps going back to change this podcast. What a jerk!Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Put up your Dux, because JCVDecember fights on!This week, Brian and Cargill step into the kumite and battle it out with Van Damme’s breakout film: Bloodsport.The guys exchange jabs as they breakdown the pros and cons of what is arguably the second best version of this same movie that Van Damme made three times. They also discuss flashback troubles, propose an 80s soundtrack singer kumite, and Frank Dux pops in to take credit for everything.If your bodies are ready and your hearts are on fire, push it over the wire by downloading and listening to this week’s episode!

Brian and Cargill are joined once again by Derek Mahr as they spin-kick off their JCVDecember celebration with the best puckin' Die Hard ripoff of all time: Sudden Death. Ok, it might not be the best Die Hard ripoff, but it's definitely the meanest and the most hockey-y.Thrill as Van Damme beats the stuffing out of a penguin mascot! Recoil in fear as Powers Boothe fills your mouth with spiders! Scratch your heads in confusion as we contemplate JCVD's double identity as both a Mega Man villain AND a Chili's manager.All this plus, the Cargill joke that made Brian contemplate retiring from podcasting. What are you waiting for, Van Dammit? Download and listen now!Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

In this week's Mongo-sized episode, Brian & Cargill, kings of the impossible, travel back to planet Mongo to talk about Flash Gordon...but like actually talk about Flash Gordon this time.They rock out to Queen, worship Ming von Sydow, and get lost in the technicolor fever dream of this 80s fantasy classic. These impetuous boys also discuss Flash Gordon's incestuous relationship with Star Wars, whether it's cool to wear your own name on a teeshirt, and their theory that the whole movie might be a certain Jets quarterback's concussed delusion. For god's sake, strap yourselves down for this one.You bored, Klytus? Download, listen, and share this episode.Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

It has been dormant for a long time, but like the mighty McRib, Modern Junkfood Masters has returned! This time around, Brian and Cargill honor writer/director Lorene Scafaria. They discuss the oddly embraceable hipsterism of Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist, the heartfelt apocalypse of Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, and the poignant, autobiographical rabbit hole of The Meddler. All this, plus, the creation of The Meatloaf Connection (which will almost certainly be appearing at your local mall food court), a discussion of J.K. Simmons' mustache game, and the least appetizing reference to Oreos you've ever heard! Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Welcome, brothers and sisters! Cargillvember trucks along as we pitch our tents for a Leap of Faith revival. As we discuss the pros and cons of this Steve Martin vehicle, we knew we needed someone who is himself a pro at being a con: Night Attack/Scam School's Brian Brushwood.We discuss the tricks of the con man trade as they pertain to televangelists and pray-for-pay preachers, Leap of Faith's heavenly cast, and why Liam Neeson should have played Doc Brown. Also, during the recording, Brian's computer becomes possessed by a demon. Was it a hoax, or the genuine article? You decide.Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Junkfood Cinema is here to spice up your life as Brian & Cargill tell you why you want why you really really want to revisit Spice World.No, we’re not kidding. The guys’ two minds become one as they explain the exceptional satire of this bugnuts vehicle for Britain’s premier girl group of the late 90s. They touch upon the self-effacing humor, the cavalcade of cameos, and why Spice World at least belongs in the same conversation as Purple Rain and A Hard Day’s Night. They’re giving you everything, and all that they want from you is the promise you will download and share.