Border Boss

This week we appreciate the sporting life with the lively arts of slapping, lamppost tossing, one-handed chili methods and the geolocation thereof before driving a pin directly into the capital of Utah in our fantasy travel map and then completely unrelatedly thinking about the pre-jazz post-hardcore stylings of hot ICEBURNS in your area.

This week we visit your cousin and check out his situation before a reading of names in honor of all the WWII guys who came home to weird cousins and stuff. This episode officially marks the beginning of our formal struggle to complete the USA map magnets on our RV by covering a band from every state we haven't hit yet. This month, Reno NV's THIS COMPUTER KILLS.

It hasn't been Halloween for months but your blood will run cold when the episode unexpectedly jump scares into spooky chat although now that I have spoiled this for you, you'll be all tense waiting for scares and won't have any fun. Aww man I really pooched it dude I'm sorry. Let's hit the gym and talk about Seattle's HIMSA instead.

The thin veneer of democracy peels away like delicately shredded layers of slow roasted chicken as we contemplate such 2020 topics as working from home and self improvement before doing the hard and honest work of listening to an incredibly serious record from deepest darkest Indiana ca. 1994, a rare fossil from our library that some prior intern has labeled ONCE AGAIN.

AUDIO PROBLEMS - One of us (no spoilers) has a very thumpy boomy mic today. It's luxurious and imported. Try to persevere over these bassy audio apparitions as we talk about subscription model appliances and wack-a-noodling the innocent bystander 6 feet behind you before setting sail across the Atlantic again to scrutinize the violent tendencies of the german doctors in BATTLE ROYALE.

This week we decide that the holidays must persevere despite the failings of local cinema and un-local food / foot crossovers. Some people experience charity by inviting in an unsavory relative or setting a plate for a houseless neighbor... for us it's listening to a fast hardcore band. So open your hearts and your wallets for the sake of Massachusetts hardcore all-stars SLEEPER CELL.

This week we open up a late christmas gift strictly 4 locals only then go all nights-after-dark on food reviewing before getting up to our necks in the Akron scene with often mentioned / never covered DON AUSTIN. Hey Don, do any of youse know the Waitresses? I am a huge fan!

It's the holiday season, so hoop-de-doo and dickory dock. This week we pay a visit to grandma's to ask her what people used to eat on Christmas in the 1400's then we devour all of the varied creams and special fishes in the house in preparation for god's favorite rust belt curators of every type of breakdown, Erie PA's xDISCIPLEx.

Drones, Dunes, Departures, Drinks... it's just a rollercoaster of a news cycle this week as we used the holidays as an excuse to briefly dissolve our only source of revenue and curl up in a miserable cave slowly building up uric acid in our bodies as the winter passes us by. Today's record is by a band adjacent to several legends, NYC's own HELL NO.

This week we join America and perhaps the world in general for literally the first thing we all agree on since probably Terminator 2 before contemplating the brutal sandblaster of time, same as every week. At some point we explore the deep, familiar wrinkles of 3 forgotten sons of Massachusetts who ground as hard as you could grind via the sweet 'n sour sounds of GUERNICA.

It's cyber week and you should be shopping and as respectors of high, slithering late capitalism, we agree to not take up too much of your time so REAL QUICK HERE'S GERMANY'S OWN DAWNBREED. Use coupon code DAWNBREEDSMOKEZ on amazon dot com to save 600% on slim trousers.

It's not easy bein' greazy this week as we prepare to eat large meals and become very lazy youtube thousandaires without lifting even a single finger. In celebration of this new pathway to wealth and independence, we crack open a rare french vintage to share with friends even if they don't drink because what's your problem, man? Don't you like xUPxRIGHTSx???

This week we gloat, gamble, and gorge on gorditas as a way to bedevil and delay the reaper's scythe of the First Seven Inch Club having to review a fast hardcore record. Oh you like fast hardcore? Well go sick y2k style to New Jersey's fast yung mayors, TEAR IT UP.

You never know how things are gonna turn out. You could live for almost 50 years with a body full of aneurysms and still make Thriller or you could look like a waterlogged bog corpse at age 24. But we're gonna keep doing what we do and so should you. We charged people money this week to hear a very troubling record so this one's on the house. ALL NATURAL LEMON & LIME FLAVORS.

Join us on the dock to talk about baseball, being extremely buzzed in lakeside vans, and all the other good things this dying world is stealing from us. If there's time, we will one-up anything in your pitiful collection by whipping out this hard slab from Auburn, NY's UNDERSIDE.

This week we soft-launch a concept of wholly investing in being weird creeps from the 70s, hungering for fiscally limited foodstuffs and the wisdom of 17th century livestock while listening to the intriguingly varied local but also globe-transversal sounds of Thrashin' Mad's promising boys, MEDICINE MAN.

This week we excrete and expulse our way into the pan-holiday season via an infusion of chainsaw clowns and pro-ice toddlers before embarking on a journey deep into the mysterious western coast of A-ME-RI-CA where a town named SAN-DI-E-GO exists simultaneously in all latitudes. Enjoy the signature yet troublesome sounds of this omnipresent constituency's local troubadours, SPANAKORZO.

The train of time finally leaves our bodies tumbling off into a ditch as our heads ring like hammers on steel torn between BOOM and DOOM until we are briefly distracted from the chill of death by the vintage passions of Santa Cruz and/or maybe SoCal's own FLOODGATE.

So many cool guys are out here dying this month but we're out here LIVING. Living MAS in fact. You probably thought we'd forgotten our core values but we have been at this a long time and the arc of podcasting always bends toward running for the border. Band? What band? OH you mean FACADE BURNED BLACK.

This week we grow older and older before your very eyes, slowly gumming a bowl of licorice allsorts while trying to figure out how to make a PDF. In order to milk youthful energy out of the world, we listen to the sounds of boys in their prime singing primal young boy things while coming of age in the warlike city-state of Syracuse. Protect your vitals, it's OVERSIGHT!