We Hate Movies

"Danger Room Liaisons... someone make a parody poster... with Magneto in place of Malkovich" - Eric On this episode of Too Old for This Shit, we're chatting about X-Men '97's "Fire Made Flesh" and "Motendo/Lifedeath - Part 1"! Airing March 27 and April 3 of this year, these episode see our mutant X-Men friends battling Mr. Sinister in a haunted version of the mansion, clone Jean Grey becoming the Goblin Queen, Jubilee and Sunspot getting sucked into—WARNING! This Danger Room simulation is for subscribers only! To access the full episode, along with hours and hours of exclusive content you cannot get anywhere else, subscribe to our Patreon! Experience the WHM family of shows, including The Nexus (Star Trek), The Gleep Glossary (Star Wars), Animation Damnation, MELR0210, and more!

“To this day, as of right now, as the words are coming out of my mouth… I have no clue how the stock market works!” - Andrew  On this month’s patron-selected We ❤️ Movies episode, we’re chatting about the absolutely fantastic cautionary tale, yes, folks, a cautionary tale, Oliver Stone’s Wall Street! How incredible is Michael Douglas in this movie? Does it get any better than that Talking Heads needle drop? How terribly miscast was—hold it right there, it's the SEC! Just kidding, but this episode is for subscribers only. To access the full show, along with hundreds of hours of exclusive bonus content, sign up for our Patreon today!

On this week's OSL, we're reviewing the box office smash hit, Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire, reacting to trailers for The Penguin miniseries and Jerry Seinfeld's Unfrosted, checking out a Liam Neeson-starring Secret Movie™️ from Ireland called In the Land of Saints and Sinners, and more! Catch us on tour this spring in Atlanta where we're talking Gerard Butler in Gamer, Houston where we're making our debut talking Robocop 2, and Austin where we'll be doing a We Love Movies episode all about From Dusk Till Dawn! Ticketing information available on our website! And be sure to scope out our new NIGHT VISION and TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT merch designs in our Tee Public shop! On-Screen Live airs Mondays @ noon/EST on our YouTube and Twitch channels, so subscribe to the show on whichever platform you frequent!

“Yes! Bring me more of that sharp profanity!” - Andrew on the Major League script On this week’s episode, we’re kicking off SHEENPRIL here on We Hate Movies with a chat about the beloved sports comedy, Major League! How bonkers is it that Tom Berenger’s Jake Taylor is straight-up stalking Rene Russo’s Lynn Wells throughout this whole movie? Was the real Willie Mays Hayes murdered by Wesley’s character and this guy just took his place at the tryouts? How many pounds of gravel did James Gammon have to eat throughout his life to get that majestic voice? And who knew Sheen’s Ricky “Wild Thing” Vaughn was going to be such a huge sensation? PLUS: Who wins in a fight between James Gammon and Rip Torn?!  Major League stars Tom Berenger, Charlie Sheen, Corbin Bernsen, Margaret Whitton, James Gammon, Rene Russo, Wesley Snipes, Charles Cyphers, Chelcie Ross, Dennis Haysbert, and Bob Uecker as Harry Doyle; directed by David S. Ward. This episode is brought to you in part by Rocket Money. Stop wasting money on things

On this week's OSL, we're reviewing Ghostbusters legacy sequel #2, Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire, the new horror film Rosemary's Nunnery, oops, I mean Immaculate, and the straight-to-Amazon's-bowels reboot of Road House starring Jake Gyllenhaal! We're also checking in on the weekend box office to see if it got BUSTED or if Kung Fu Panda's third sequel remained supreme! Catch us on tour this spring in Atlanta where we're talking Gerard Butler in Gamer, Houston where we're making our debut talking Robocop 2, and Austin where we'll be doing a We Love Movies episode all about From Dusk Till Dawn! Ticketing information available on our website! And be sure to scope out our new NIGHT VISION and TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT merch designs in our Tee Public shop! On-Screen Live airs Mondays @ noon/EST on our YouTube and Twitch channels, so subscribe to the show on whichever platform you frequent!

“If you are not 100% always entertained by [Yahoo Serious] you are fucked for good with this movie!” - Chris On this week’s episode, the 2024 Listener Request Month comes to a close with a discussion about the well-made (craft-wise), but incredibly stupid comedy, Young Einstein! How much of a banger is this soundtrack? How gorgeous are these panoramic shots of Tasmania? How many times can Yahoo Serious fall through or off something in this movie? How funny is that little Critters-esque Tasmanian Devil costume? And come on, what are the odds a Cat Pie is a real dish? PLUS: An extended analysis of Jake Gyllenhaal not bathing. Young Einstein stars Yahoo Serious, Odile Le Clezio, John Howard, Peewee Wilson, Su Cruickshank, Roger Ward, and Basil Clarke as Charles Darwin; directed by Yahoo Serious. Be sure to catch us on tour this spring, y’all! We’ll be in Atlanta on 4/25 (Gamer), Houston on 5/14 (Robocop 2), and Austin on 5/15 (From Dusk Till Dawn)! Tickets are on sale now and meet & greets are happeni

On this week's OSL, we're reviewing the new David Dastmalchian horror film, Late Night with the Devil, reacting to the trailer for the remake of The Crow starring Bill Skarsgård, checking out a Pierce Brosnan Secret Movie™️ called Fast Charlie,  going over the weekend box office, and more! Catch us on tour this spring in Atlanta where we're talking Gerard Butler in Gamer, Houston where we're making our debut talking Robocop 2, and Austin where we'll be doing a We Love Movies episode all about From Dusk Till Dawn! Ticketing information available on our website! On-Screen Live airs Mondays @ noon/EST on our YouTube and Twitch channels, so subscribe to the show on whichever platform you frequent!

“He’s one of the worst to ever do it, folks…” - Steve on Chris Klein On this week’s episode, we’re chatting about the terrible, hatchet job remake, Rollerball! Why do studios put so much trust in dumbass test screenings? Why did McTiernan think getting all the social commentary out of this remake was a smart idea? Why were they banking so hard on the charm of… ECW’s Paul Heyman? How many re-shoots does it take to sink a movie? And does this movie have one of the worst soundtracks of all time? PLUS: Orson Welles weighs in on the use of… NIGHT. VISION.  Rollerball stars Chris Klein, Jean Reno, LL Cool J, Rebecca Romijn, Naveen Andrews, Oleg Taktarov, Andrew Bryniarski, and Paul Heyman as English Sports Announcer; directed by John McTiernan. This episode is brought to you in part by Astepro! Get fast-acting nasal allergy symptom relief with Astepro. Go to Astepro allergy dot com for a discount so you can Astepro and Go! today. A-S-T-E-P-R-O allergy dot com. Astepro and Go! (Use as directed for relief of nasa

“Wolverine’s the best Canadian fictional character of all time, probably?” - Eric On this preview episode of our new show, Too Old for This Shit, we’re chatting about the two-part pilot of X-Men ’92, “Night of the Sentinels.” Originally airing on October 31 and November 7, 1992, this episode sees Jubilee move in with the X-Men after her narc foster father calls the feds on her, Wolverine dressing like Al Borland from Home Improvement in his down time, Gambit aggressively hitting on a girl at the mall, Cyclops and Wolverine visiting a bar filled exclusively with Jack Nicholson impersonators, Beast being sent to a black site prison, and Morph getting hilariously murdered! The rest of this first series of Too Old for This Shit is going to cover the first season of the all-new Disney+ show, X-Men ’97. The full release schedule is available on our website. Going forward, this show will be available exclusively for subscribers on the Walsh tier of our Patreon, so make sure you don’t miss a minute of these X-Men

On this week's OSL, we're reviewing Rose Glass's fantastic Love Lies Bleeding, and taking a look back at last night's Oscars ceremony by talking about the winners, seeing how Jimmy Kimmel did as host, Arnold & Danny reuniting on stage, John Cena's total package, Pacino totally flubbing the Best Picture presentation, and, of course, checking in on Chris Cabin's annual list of poor souls that were Farina'd during the In Memoriam reel! We'll also be going over the weekend box office numbers & more! Catch us on tour this spring in Atlanta where we're talking Gerard Butler in Gamer, Houston where we're making our debut talking Robocop 2, and Austin where we'll be doing a We Love Movies episode all about From Dusk Till Dawn! Ticketing information available on our website! On-Screen Live airs Mondays @ noon/EST on our YouTube and Twitch channels, so subscribe to the show on whichever platform you frequent!

“Ooo, yeah, throw a plate at me, Demi Moore!” - Eric On this week’s episode, the 2024 Listener Request Month continues with a convo all about the absolute trash-fest that is, Indecent Proposal! Why don’t we see the Moore/Redford sex scene? Why are we doing that flashback with Woody Harrelson and Demi Moore, using a bad wig and braces respectively, to comically play 19 year-olds? Why are we bothering with the lame, dueling, his & hers VoiceOver tracks? How cowardly were these filmmakers and studio execs who were scared to have Redford play an actual villain? And why didn’t we ever get the Seymour Cassel spin-off film, Shackleford?! PLUS: Using Robert Redford movie titles as sex slang, fun for all!  Indecent Proposal stars Demi Moore, Woody Harrelson, Robert Redford, Seymour Cassel, Oliver Platt, Billy Bob Thornton, Billy Connolly, Danny Zorn, Kevin West, and Rip Taylor as Mr. Langford; directed by Adrian Lyne. This week’s episode is brought to you in part by Rocket Money! Stop wasting money on things y

“We open on this Eyes Wide Shut party…” - Steve On this month’s patrons-only and patron-selected We ❤️ Movies episode, we’re finally sitting down to talk about one of the absolute best to ever hit the screen, The Fugitive! How incredible is Harrison Ford’s performance in this? Has Chicago ever looked cooler in a movie that’s not The Blues Brothers? Is there a better lived-in team of—HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, DR. KIMBLE! This episode is for Patreon subscribers only! To unlock the full episode, along with hours and hours of exclusive bonus shows like Once In A Lifetime, MELR0210, The Nexus, and more, including AD-FREE We Hate Movies, head to our Patreon and sign up today!

On this week's OSL, we're reviewing Dune: Part Two, reacting to the trailers for both Kevin Costner's latest vanity project-- um, epic western, Horizon: An American Saga, as well as the "return" (lol) of Kevin Spacey in the unintentionally-laugh-riot-looking hitman film, Peter Five Eight! We're also briefly talking about the Oscars (more on them next week, naturally), and going over the Dune-heavy weekend box office numbers! PLUS: We reveal our next major Patreon offering, and it's a show you will NOT want to miss! Catch us on tour this spring in Atlanta where we're talking Gerard Butler in Gamer, Houston where we're making our debut talking Robocop 2, and Austin where we'll be doing a We Love Movies episode all about From Dusk Till Dawn! Ticketing information available on our website! On-Screen Live airs Mondays @ noon/EST on our YouTube and Twitch channels, so subscribe to the show on whichever platform you frequent!

“We’re playing pool with Captain Heart Attack here…” - Eric on this movie’s police captain On this week’s episode, we’re kicking off the 2024 Listener Request Month with a dirty-ass 1970’s-feeling cop movie that came out in 1989, Night Game! Why is Roy Scheider’s character making such a big deal out of this gifted television set? Can that future mother-in-law just take it down a notch or two? Why is that police chief character looking like he’s about to have a heart attack in every scene? Why does this movie focus so much on Roy Scheider’s upcoming wedding? And is this actually a slasher movie? PLUS: Hilarious fuck-ups from famous serial killers!  Night Game stars Roy Scheider, Karen Young, Richard Bradford, Paul Gleason, Carlin Glynn, Anthony Palmer, Alex Morris, Rex Linn, and Lane Smith as Witty; directed by Peter Masterson.  This week’s episode is brought to you in part by Bespoke Post! Get a free Mystery Gift with your first monthly shipment when you sign up at Box of Awesome DOT COM and enter the cod

On this week's OSL, we're reviewing Ethan Coen's Drive-Away Dolls, reacting to the trailer for Eli Roth's Borderlands, going over the weekend box office, and chatting with film writer and Vulture Stunt Awards co-founder, Brandon Streussnig about this year's awards lineup! On-Screen Live airs Mondays @ noon/EST on our YouTube and Twitch channels, so subscribe to the show on whichever platform you frequent! Catch us on tour this spring in Atlanta, Houston and Austin! Ticketing information available on our website!

“I think Vegas is the place where you also go to bury your mistakes and make new ones…” - Chris  On this week’s episode, we welcome back our Dead Meat buds, James A. Janisse and Chelsea Rebecca, to talk about the completely entertaining, direct-to-video horror sequel, Leprechaun 3! How amazingly does the Leprechaun fit right in when he gets to Las Vegas? How hysterically naive is this Scott fella when playing in the casino? Why does the Big Boss at this casino have his big, fancy, Boss Suite… on the third floor? And why does it take the Leprechaun so long to kill that pawn shop owner? PLUS: Where can we get a copy of this amazing folklore encyclopedia CD-ROM? Leprechaun 3 stars Warwick Davis, John Gatins, Lee Armstrong, John DeMita, Michael Callan, Marcelo Tubert, and Caroline Williams as Loretta; directed by Brian Trenchard-Smith. Be sure to catch us on tour this spring, gang! We’ll be hitting Atlanta, Houston and Austin and we wanna see you come out! Head over to our tour page and get them tix! In Atlan

On this week's OSL, we're going over the weekend numbers (will One Love conquer all, or will Jesus himself interfere?), reviewing the film America was begging for, Madame Web, reacting to the rad trailer for X-Men '97, and holding the LIVE DRAWING for the 2024 Listener Request Month titles!  On-Screen Live airs Mondays @ noon/EST on our YouTube and Twitch channels, so subscribe to the show on whichever platform you frequent! Catch us on tour this spring in Atlanta, Houston and Austin! Ticketing information available on our website!

“I think the beauty of [this movie], if there is, is that Patrick Stewart gets to act like a child through most of this! - Chris  On this week’s episode, this one’s a long-time coming as we finally chat about the ridiculous Patrick Stewart made-for-Showtime thriller, Safe House! What’s with this abhorrent Pool Man character and the impressions? How hilarious is it that the so-called villain’s name is pronounced like, “Michael Moore”? How many times has Patrick Stewart’s character almost been sued by maids and groundskeepers for all the ‘drills’ he runs around them? And why couldn’t we get a little more Hector Elizondo in this movie? PLUS: John Wayne tries to order lunch at a Wendy’s!  Safe House stars Patrick Stewart, Kimberly Williams-Paisley, Hector Elizondo, Joy Kilpatrick, and Craig Shoemaker as Stuart; directed by Eric Steven Stahl. This episode is sponsored in part by MeUndies! Good things come in big packages at MeUndies. Get 20% off your first order, plus free shipping, at MeUndies dot com slash w

On this week's OSL, we're taking a look at the dreadful Super Bowl-weekend box office, reacting to a bevy of Big Game trailers including Twisters, Deadpool & Wolverine, and Despicable Me 4; and giving our thoughts so far on the FX series, Feud: Capote vs. The Swans! On-Screen Live airs Mondays @ noon/EST on our YouTube and Twitch channels, so subscribe to the show on whichever platform you frequent! Catch us on tour this spring in Atlanta, Houston and Austin! Ticketing information available on our website!

“This [movie] is as important to the Special Relationship as anything that ever happened in the 90s” - Chris On this week’s episode, we’re chatting about one of the most financially successful but also grating and poorly-edited rom-coms of all time, Notting Hill! How is Hugh Grant keeping this travel bookstore in business? Was anyone gonna buy that cool Beavis and Butt-head stained glass window? Why is Jules acting so tired and bored in this one? And how did they let the final edit come out this shoddy? PLUS: Steve gives a British door update! Notting Hill stars Julia Roberts, Hugh Grant, James Dreyfus, Gina McKee, Tim McInnerny, Emma Chambers, Hugh Bonneville, Emily Mortimer, Clarke Peters, Mischa Barton, and Rhys Ifans as Spike; directed by Roger Michell. This episode is brought to you in part by Seed! Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01® Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/whm and use code 25WHM to get 25% off your first month. That’s 25% off your first month of Seed’s DS-01® Daily Synbiotic at Seed dot com s